R.I.P. Jeff, Clive Palmer’s Beloved Tyrannosaurus Rex

It is with the heaviest of hearts that I must convey the news that Queensland, Australia, and indeed the World has lost one of its most beloved cultural icons. A towering force and beacon of hope and inspiration the globe over, has sadly passed away.

Clive Palmer‘s semi-animatronic Tyrannosaurus Rex – absolutely better known to us all as Jeff – has sadly made the trip to the great Jurassic Park in the sky. He was two years old.
Rangers and dino handlers at Palmer’s Palmersaurus exhibit at the Coolum Resort on the Sunshine Coast were awoken to find Jeff engulfed in flames at around 1:30am this morning. Despite valiant efforts from park staff and responding fire fighters, Jeff’s life could not be saved.
We warn you that the following image contains an extremely graphic depiction of Jeff’s remains, and is not for the weak stomached.

A Queensland Fire & Emergency spokesman, bravely fronting media after witnessing Jeff’s demise, described the sheer horror and psychologically confronting scene that met responding officers as they arrived with the following detailed and harrowing statement:

There was a dinosaur on fire.
Jeff arrived at the resort – presumably, though not confirmed, on consignment from the InGen Corporation‘s Pacific facilities on Las Cinco Muertes – and immediately caused a stir. His loveable nature and calm disposition belying his breed’s carnivorous reputation. In fact, such was the popularity of Jeff that the Australian PGA had to move the Australian PGA Championship golf tournament away from the resort, due to the influx of people on the resort course’s 9th fairway caused by Jeff’s presence. A small price to pay for the glory of having such a majestic creature’s company.
But now, sadly, Jeff is no more. He has ceased to be. Bereft of life, he rests in peace. And we are all poorer for it.
We’d hope that whoever carried out this reprehensible act is caught and punished to the full extent of the law – and then some. But we also know that’s not what Jeff would have wanted. A peaceful creature, heart full of forgiveness. Far more virtuous than you or I.
Sleep well, dear, sweet Jeff. We can only wish that one day we all roar half as well as you did.
Photo via News.com.au.