Laura Dern Wants To Fuck Baby Yoda & I’m Not Going To Kink Shame Her For It

laura dern baby yoda

Hollywood actress Laura Dern has made headlines over the last few months because of her weird obsession with Baby Yoda, but her recent appearance on The Late Show With Stephen Colbert has taken it to a whole new level.

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It’s been a big year for the Jurassic Park actress, and straight off her Best Supporting Actress win at the Golden Globes, she sat down with Stephen Colbert to talk about the usual Hollywood stuff.

You know, films, award shows, relationships. The usual.

“The people, the people want to know, what did you mean? Did you see Baby Yoda at a basketball game?”

“I’m just going to say this because we’ve been in this business for a long time now and I was raised by actors, there can be a frenzy when people are friends or have some some kind of relationship and people want to wonder, you know?”

Is Laura Dern fucking with us, or does she really want to bump uglies with Baby Yoda?

At this point, I am unsure whether Laura Dern is a master of keeping her name in the press, if she’s actually dating Baby Yoda, or if she’s just on acid 24/7.

In case you missed it, Dern made headlines late last year for swearing she bumped into Baby Yoda at an NBA game. This is a claim she still stands by to this day.

“He’s a star, you’re a star and you’ve been seen together… at basketball games,” Stephen Colbert said. “Is there a chance this is anything?”

“As a baby, he’s a 50 year old baby, so it’s not inappropriate,” she replied. “I said to my friends, the next man I’m going to be with, I want him to be incredibly wise, great sense of humour, I don’t mind being the taller one.”

Okay, so we know that Laura Dern isn’t mistaking Baby Yoda for a rapper, or Timothee Chalamet, she really does just want that lil green peen.

“I didn’t mention green but you never know what you’re going to get.”

Laura Dern, what the fuck?

“Oh my god those eyes, I can’t tell you.” “When I say I just want you to look into my eyes forever, he’s definitely going to be doing that.”

Dern is an A-list actress. She’s starred in everything from Jurassic Park to Little Women. She’s won an Emmy, five Golden Globes, among countless nominations. She really does not need the publicity of dating whatever the fuck Baby Yoda is.

We’re two weeks into 2020 and Laura Dern and Baby Yoda are somehow Hollywood’s hottest couple.