This Python Entered A NSW Home Via A Ceiling Fan, So Excuse Me While I Scream Into A Pillow

A Wollongong family discovered a python in their home yesterday, and, let me tell you, the sheer size of the beast will have your hearts collectively falling through your bumholes.

Snake removalist extraordinaire Glen Peacock, (AKA Mr Illawarra Snake Catcher) was called in to take care of the slippery situation, after Bulli residents heard noises coming from their bathroom and spotted the beast living its truth in the sink.

The footage, posted the Illawarra Snake Catcher Facebook page, shows Glen calmly picking up the diamond python, which was roughly 1.5m in length, according news.com.au. Glen reckons it’d been nesting in the family roof when it fell through the ceiling fan. Let me repeat, nesting in the family roof. Fell through the ceiling fan. I think the fuck not.

“Do you want to deposit it outside our yard?” the mother, I assume, can be heard asking. I commend this woman for nonchalantly entertaining the idea of Ms Snake hanging around the yard, but, as someone who has a very healthy respect for snakes, I would’ve preferred the unwelcome visitor to be released in a land far, far away from mine.

If you also have a similar respect for snakes, the following footage will make your skin scrawl.

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