My hands are shaking as I type this, I can’t… I mean… It’s just that… It’s…
Hot Chip vending machines will be rolled out across the country by the end of the year.
Just take a moment to really let that sink in.
Hot chips. Chipped slices of starchy, potato glory, deep fried crispy brown. Served to you in a cup via a vending machine. A VENDING MACHINE.
This is no mere news announcement, friends. This is a higher being showering love and adoration unto the children of the earth. This is the be all and end. This is a day we’ll all look back on and recognise as the day our society truly began to achieve inner peace. We’ll tell our grandkids about this day. They’ll build statues in its honour.
If it were the 40s, I’d hold today’s hand, take it down to the malt shop, and ask it to go steady with me. If it were the 90s, I’d probably meet up with it behind the bike sheds, rip a cone from a bong made out of a Sprite can and try and give it a gobby.
A WA company appropriately named the Hot Chip Company will be rolling out these glorious machines, after spending five years developing them. Currently four prototypes are being trialled in Perth and Adelaide. A spokesman for potato processor Bendotti Exporters stated that the machine currently works as such:
“You put your money in and it goes from frozen to the fryer and in your cup within two minutes and 20 seconds.“
But the developers of the machine are working to get that time down to at least two minutes, potentially quicker.
The company is in the final stages of its research and development phase. If all goes according to plan, they’ll be distributed around the country and in operation by Christmas this year.
Again, we say repeatedly…
Photo: Jan Kruger via Getty Images.
via ABC News.