The ole rumour mill is pedalling like its never pedalled before, today, as a gossip rag hint has caused speculation of break-the-internet proportions. Rumour has it: Prince Harry and Emma Watson *might* be dating. A social media frenzy naturally has ensued.
That phrase should, of course, be loaded with as many asterisk clauses as possible; it does, in effect, hold as much standing as me saying, “I *might* enjoy settling down on a Saturday night to a marathon of Two And A Half Men and The Big Bang Theory while catching up on Rupert Murdoch’s twitter feed and eating my own hair,” see – it’s simply not true. Praise that *might*, though.
So how did this rumour come about? The origin story of Britain’s li’l rumour du jour is thrillingly local: Australia’s Woman’s Day put out a “report” on Monday, claiming that the pair are partaking in secret dates of the romantic fashion. Quaint! But let’s take a look at what Woman’s Day “exclusively” revealed a bit closer: the article claims that Prince Harry wanted to get to know Emma Watson and invited her out. Seems legit, why not, etc. But then: “Although 12 other friends went along too to make Emma feel a little more comfortable, the pair hit it off!
That’s called a party, Woman’s Day, a party. Breaking news, people, Prince Harry and Emma Watson went to a party. Sooooo, when are they getting hitched?
Now look. This is not to say that Prince Harry and perfect angel Emma Watson dating wouldn’t be a neat idea for the Royal Family image – but let’s analyse this potential match made in Hogwarts as the pure fan fiction that it is.
The ‘Harry’ connection, the red hair – Prince Harry sure does tick the boxes as a physical amalgamation of Hermione’s two main men. Observe:
Can’t argue with that.
But getting excited about the match is probably a dumb idea:
oh my god EMMA WATSON potentially dating PRINCE HARRY is the best thing that has EVER HAPPENED TO ME IN MY LIFE
— beckahh! (@daysofbex) February 20, 2015
Prince Harry dating Emma Watson. How very Grace Of Monaco. Might be jumping the ??but imagine the wedding dress Karl would knock up for her ??
— Noemi De Luca (@nemmy_d) February 20, 2015
*recoils*
I heard Prince Harry & Emma Watson were maybe dating & immediately insulted everyone by recasting the best movie ever pic.twitter.com/LYRO9naQsW
— Erin Strecker (@ErinStrecker) February 20, 2015
If Prince Harry is really dating Emma Watson…I just might die??????
— Lauren Muenzler (@Laurenrae11) February 21, 2015
It goes on like this for a good few days worth of mindless tweets. Go home, internet, you’re drunk.
Via Woman’s Day.
Lead image by Pascal Le Segretain via Getty Images.