If you’re not champing at the bit like a horse with rabies for the upcoming season of The Bachelor Australia, you clearly don’t like fun.
What is not to like about a footy star who is basically a hot Russell Coight (Nick ‘Honey Badger’ Cummins, for those of you who don’t like fun) galumphing his way through a series of dates? I will tell you this for free, there is nothing not to like here.
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TenDaily have been dropping mini-profiles of the women vying for Nick’s heart/soul/dick over the last couple of weeks, and we’ve copped two new gals today – Dasha and Vanessa.
Dasha’s a 32-year-old mum from Adelaide, and she’s also a personal trainer who describes herself using words like “curious” and “free spirit”. She’s also said she’s after a “man, not a boy”, which like – has she MET the Honey Badger?
Vanessa is a legal secretary hailing from Victoria, and her personal motto is “revenge is sweet”, which is scary the bejeezus out of me and I haven’t even crossed the woman. Who’s personal motto is “revenge is sweet”? How many cars have you keyed? How many shampoo bottles have you filled with hair bleach? I’m nervous.
Anyway, she says she’s looking for a dude with “a great sense of humour who she can build a future with”. This is more in line with the Honey Badger, I think. TBF I do not care for the football, any kind, so I actually only know this guy from Bachelor promos and his Instagram. But I reckon I’m on the money here.
Honestly I am so fucking pumped for this season, can stupid Survivor finish already so we can get cracking is all I will say. NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR FITNESS SKILLS OR HOW LONG YOU CAN GO WITHOUT A HAIR WASH, GUYS.
