There are two things in this world that are for certain.
1. Learning about different cultures and experiencing new things makes us better humans.
2. We, as humans, need to be fed and watered.
In the interest of doing both at once we had a think about some of the most ridiculous festivals from around the world, whereby eating and drinking are the name of the game, and have committed them to digital paper for your consideration. Our wanderings through mouth-based festivals started with Oktoberfest for inspiration, a bloody great place to begin, and at times made our own mouths both water and want to recede back up into our craniums.
We’ve tried to keep it brief but Honourable Mentions go to Waikiki Spam Jam [a festival in Hawaii celebrating the most filthy King of the canned meats, SPAM], Noche de los Rábanos or Night of the Radishes [a whole festival dedicated to carving radishes into the shapes of other things, in Mexico] and Tunarama in Port Lincoln, Australia, where the World Champion Tuna Toss Competition takes place annually.
‘straya.
Can you literally even stay conscious thinking about crispy as sin pork belly, lye pretzels, chicken schnittie, sugared pancake, bratwurst hotdogs, mashed potatie and steins full of German beer?
With a spiritual home of Munich, Bavaria, Germany, Oktoberfest is a 16-day festival celebrated by beer and food fans the world over. You may have heard of it.
Let this serve as a reminder to us Aussies of the greatness that comes around for one month only (or a little longer…) a year. Oktoberfest is here and if you’re too pov to head over to Germany and are looking for a way to make the most of the most sacred of festivals head to www.oktoberfest.com.au to check out what the legends at Bavarian Bier Cafe, Munich Brauhaus and LOWENBRAU have got going on.
Weekly events throughout Oktoberfest include, but are in no way limited to:
Tuesday Schnitzel Challenge,
Stein Hoist & Hold Challenge,
1kg pork knuckle Challenge,
Thursday Stein Race,
Sunday session DJs,
Oktoberfest Tasting Flight,
Huge Bondi Beach Oktoberfest Jägermeister parties,
and the Munich Bier Bike South Wharf Tours.
To register head HERE.
Prost!
HOKITIKA WILDFOODS FESTIVAL
This is a festival in New Zealand dedicated to, according to their facebook, “gourmet bush tucker and natural food sourced from the land and sea, presented in an innovative manner. The emphasis is on novel, tasty and healthy wild food.” But essentially it’s all about eating weird shit.
Thanks to the lovely local stall holders the food on the menu includes, but is in no way limited to:
Cow’s placenta pate,
Rhubarb champagne,
Sheep tails,
Fresh goat chevre herb dip on rustic bread,
Wildberry icecream with cicada topping,
Rose petal champagne,
Salmon kebabs,
Offal shots,
Crocodile bites,
Muttonbird,
Smoked eel,
Huhu grubs,
Elderflower bubbly,
Grasshoppers,
Locusts,
Crickets,
Beetles,
Tarantula
…and booze.
The thing in Buñol, Spain, where everyone just fangs approx. 250,000 pounds of tomatoes at each other ¯_(“~)_/¯
Photo by David Ramos.
THE REDNECK GAMES
Do you ever just get a hankerin’ for an alligator on a stick?
Photo by Robert Sullivan.
The Redneck Games, which you may be surprised to learn are held in the United States, began back when the city of Atlanta won the bid to host the 1996 Olympic Games and some in the American media commented that it would end up being run by “a bunch of rednecks.” Little did they know a bunch of rednecks heard and thought it would be an absolutely splendid idea!
Thus the Summer Redneck Games of Easy Dublin, Georgia, were born.
Today it’s an event that is all about family and PG fun. Kidding. With respect, it’s about Redneck culture and all of the gross and amazing things that that entails. Events include, but are in no way limited to:
The cigarette flip,
Bobbing for pig’s trotters,
Seed spitting,
Toilet seat throwing,
Mud pit belly flop,
Big-hair contest,
Wet T-shirt contest,
Armpit serenade,
Bug zapping by spitball,
Dumpster diving,
Hubcap hurling.
For each of the events, a trophy is awarded; a half crushed, empty mounted beer can.
Photo by Stephen Morton.
CHINCHILLA MELON FESTIVAL
Correct. The Chinchilla Melon Festival is exactly what it sounds like; on account of the fact that Chinchilla, 300km west of Brisbane, is known as the ‘Melon Capital’ of Australia and they darn well want to celebrate that fact.
If you feel like a delicious summer treat on a large scale and don’t hate the idea of novelty melon goods, why not join with the locals for the festivities which include, but are in no way limited to:
The ever-popular Melon Skiing,
Melon Dash for Cash,
Melon Bungee,
Melon Bullseye,
Melon Ball Games,
Chariot Race,
Melon Ironman,
Pip Spitting Competition,
Street stalls and a Parade
Art & Craft Competition,
The FREE Family Concert.
Plus, an after hours Melon Beach Party which sounds relatively loose.
via CMF FB
UP HELLY AA
Sure, ‘Up Helly Aa’ is known as one of the world’s largest fire festivals and yes, seeing a large procession of hundreds of Scots dressed as Vikings carrying flaming torches towards a long boat in the centre of Lerwick town, which they will eventually set fire to, is a beyond impressive sight. But the festival is also about what happens after the magnificent fiery ship, which has taken months to lovingly craft, has set sail.
The head of the festival, the ‘Guizer Jarl’, who is elaborately dressed in a raven-winged helmet, axe and shield, leads the proudly garbed procession and revellers alike to parties that go on all through the night and well into the next day in drinking and dancing halls throughout the town. Much food and drink is consumed – enough to make even the vikings proud – and, in the spirit of kindness to festivalgoers and their raging vikingovers, the following day is officially a public holiday.
Photo by Carl de Souza.
ST PADDY’S DAY
What a loose time Paddy’s Day is for all involved. When you think of Paddy’s Day maybe you think of whisky, maybe you think of beer (Guinness specifically) or maybe you think of green food dye in a non-alcoholic beverage. But whatever you think of, you probably aren’t considering the life and times of St. Patrick.
In Ireland and elsewhere the ‘religious’ significance may be all but gone (don’t tell me Granny I said that) but we can all enjoy a day of getting schtickered with friends. Only thing, if you do decide to go to Ireland for the actual day on March 17th – note: no one in Ireland is as in to Paddy’s Day as ‘the Americans’ – avoid Temple Bar. Unless, of course, you do want a festering mass of overkeen tourists and emerald-tinged vomit underfoot.
Photo by Greg Wood.
Title image by Johannes Simon via Getty
