Happy Birthday Jetstar and happy holidays people of Australia because the company is slinging flights with free returns for its 18th birthday sale. I’ll fetch the party hats if someone else can bring vodka cruisers.

The sale kicks off at midnight on Tuesday May 3rd and will last for 48 hours. Let’s be real, cheap flights to Bali are definitely worth staying up for.

There are a load of domestic and international flights on offer. For example, you could zoom off to Melbourne from Sydney for $69 between the 1st and 15th of September. Or you could fly Brisbane to Bali for $309 between the 12th of October and the 5th of December.

On its website Jetstar says each flightpath has a certain window of dates where you can score the $0 return. Maybe have a little suss when the long-weekend is and start curating your annual leave toot sweet.

While each flight has a different set of dates, they all take place between July 2022 and February 2023. Christmas in Hervey Bay? Why the fuck not!

International hot spots on the list include Seoul, Ho Chi Ming, Bangkok, Phuket, Auckland, Christchurch, Queenstown, Singapore and Honolulu. I’m literally salivating at the thought of plane food which shows how in need of a holiday I am.

There’s loads of domestic locations on the list too. If you’ve ever wanted to see Uluru, Hamilton Island, Hobart or the Whitsunday Coast, now’s a bloody good time to book that girls’ trip in.

You’ll still have to pay for checked baggage, but if you’re saving money on the return flights then it might be worth it. Get those outfit changes for Instagram, live your influencer fantasy.

Alternatively you can always do a bit of strategic vacuum sealing and chuck it all in your carry on tote bag. Voila! You can thank me later.

Jetstar is also slinging four new bevvies to celebrate its 18th. No judgement here, I love a seltzer as much as the next twenty-something.

The drinkies are based on four destinations: Melbourne, Bali, Queenstown and the Gold Coast. Quite a rogue combo but according to Jetstar’s Instagram, the seltzers are a “taste of [its] most popular destinations”.

They sound bloody tasty too. There’s nothing like a wee bev to settle your tummy after an eight hour flight.

Bali tastes of rambutan, soursop, hibiscus and balmy nights while the Gold Coast is flavoured with coconut, sea salt, fairy floss and good times. I’m very impressed brewing technology has levelled up enough that we can bottle balmy nights.

Similarly, the Queenstown seltzer is imbued with the flavours of cinnamon, cloves, mulled wine and adventure. Melbourne tastes of deconstructed caffe latte and cool, urban vibes. It sounds mildly disgusting but I live in Sydney. Maybe that’s just Melbourne’s vibe?

You can suss all the Ts, Cs and bonus deets on the Jetstar website. Happy holiday planning, friends!

Image: SpongeBob SquarePants