Here’s What You Weirdos Have Been Googling The Most In 2018

It’s that time of the year again, folks. Google has released Australia‘s most-searched terms of 2018 and as it turns out, none of you have changed.

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While the names you’ve all searched have changed, you’re still struggling with the same old issues. Still wondering how to cook rice in the microwave, what bitcoin is, and why your shit is green. We’ve been through this, mates, if you’re worried about what’s coming out of your ass, you really should speak to a doctor.

Let’s get into the lists.

Overall

1.      World Cup

2.      Commonwealth Games

3.      Meghan Markle

4.      Avicii

5.      Coinspot

6.      Anthony Bourdain

7.      US Open Tennis

8.      Mac Miller

9.      Bitcoin price

10.   Black Panther

News events

1.      Royal Wedding

2.      Thai cave rescue

3.      Wentworth by-election

4.      My health record

5.      Beaumont children

6.      Hawaii volcano

7.      California fires

8.      Listeria

9.      US midterm elections

10.   Blood moon

Global figures

1.      Meghan Markle

2.      Demi Lovato

3.      Freddie Mercury

4.      Khloe Kardashian

5.      Logan Paul

6.      Tristan Thompson

7.      Hailey Baldwin

8.      Sylvester Stallone

9.      Khabib

10.   Travis Scott

Aussies

1.      Barnaby Joyce

2.      Scott Morrison

3.      Peter Dutton

4.      Billy Slater

5.      Craig McLachlan

6.      Vikki Campion

7.      David Warner

8.      Chopper Read

9.      Nick Cummins

10.   Andrew Gaff

No real surprises in these lists. All big events or notable names. We’ll just move on, shall we?

Loss

1.      Avicii

2.      Anthony Bourdain

3.      Mac Miller

4.      xxxtentacion

5.      Stan Lee

6.      Kate Spade

7.      Aretha Franklin

8.      Burt Reynolds

9.      Jessica Falkholt

10.   Eurydice Dixon

How to…?

1.      How to opt out of my health record

2.      How to watch World Cup in Australia

3.      How to win Powerball

4.      How to delete Instagram

5.      Google Arts and Culture face match how to

6.      How to buy bitcoin

7.      How to lose weight fast

8.      How to screenshot on iPhone X

9.      How to delete Facebook

10.    How to lose belly fat

Powerball, huh? Get any red-hot tips? I’d wager the answer is closer to no.

What is…?

1.      What is bitcoin

2.      What is listeria

3.      What is ligma

4.      What is hazing

5.      What is a mud room

6.      What is the capital of California

7.      What is open on Good Friday

8.      What is Diwali

9.      What is blockchain

10.   What is ball tampering

Y’all still got a bit of bitcoin fever it seems. Let me help you out below.

Why is…?

1.      Why is State of Origin on Sunday

2.      Why is it called Good Friday

3.      Why is Russia OAR

4.      Why is Australia Day Jan 26

5.      Why is Tim Cahill not playing tonight

6.      Why is ANZAC Day important

7.      Why is Australia Day celebrated

8.      Why is my internet so slow

9.      Why is Nick Cummins called the honey badger

10.    Why is my poop green

Those last three are such a mood. Wow.

Recipes

1.      Keto recipes

2.      Beef stroganoff recipes

3.      Chicken curry recipes

4.      Frittata recipes

5.      Gnocchi recipes

6.      Risotto recipes

7.      Chicken soup recipes

8.      Fried rice recipes

9.      Omelette recipes

10.   Beef stew recipes

“How to cook…?”

1.      How to cook corned beef

2.      How to cook eggplant

3.      How to cook tofu

4.      How to cook silverside

5.      How to cook beetroot

6.      How to cook rice in the microwave

7.      How to cook corn

8.      How to cook couscous

9.      How to cook crayfish

10.   How to cook barramundi

As an absolutely awful cook, I’m going to say – fair enough.

Speaking of Google and food, Mars has partnered with the search giant to give away a year’s worth of Mars Bars to those who search the most obscure ‘how to’ terms. If you’re the first person to search for some absolutely boonta shit, you win.

The Sticky Searchuations campaign is giving away 150 years’ worth of Mars Bars, so start searching some weird ‘how-tos’, I guess.

Still wondering what the fuck blockchain is? We got you, mate. 


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