Steam’s Massive New Sale Launched Today If You’re Horny For Cheap Games

Do you folks like cheap games? Huh? DO YA? You sure as piss do, and the lords over at Steam have got the goods just for you.

Today the platform launched its Lunar New Year Sale, which runs from February 15 through to the 19th (16th to the 20th for us here). Before we dive into some absolute bargains, can I just point out the banner? Look at it, it’s dogs. Because it’s the year of the dog.

That robotic fella on the right there is Dog from Half-Life 2. I love the Half-Life series more than anything and you need to know that I’m beyond tickled by this. Genius.

Ok, onto the actual games. Let’s see what we got here. For starters, you can get Watch Dogs 2 at a whopping 60 per cent off, bringing it down to just $US22.76 ($28.60). The Sims 3 franchise is also marked down by a massive 75 per cent, making the main game less than $10.

Or maybe you consider yourself a train nerd. Are you horny for trains? Well you can get Train Simulator 2018 at 50 per cent off, making it $US19.99 ($25.12). If that doesn’t rustle up your rails, that’s alright, friend, there’s more.

The delightfully pleasant Undertale is also 50 per cent off, selling at $US4.99 ($6.27). One less schooner at the pub and you got yourself hours of fun, pal.

Deals. I’m hot for them.

GTA V? $37.69 (50% off). The Witcher 3? $25.12 (60% off). Fucken, Left 4 Dead 2? $2.50. Two-bloody-dollars and fifty-goddamn-cents. That’s 90 per cent off, man. I’m screaming at my desk, folks. I’m absolutely howling for savings.

Looking for VR deals? They’re here too! And look, it’s the dogs again, but now they’re wearing VR headsets! Just fuck me right up.

There’s so many more titles on sale right now, so make sure you get on over to the Steam page and check them out.

I think I need to go lie down now.