The Super Mario franchise has been around for a damn long time, and now that graphics have improved, it was only a matter of time before Nintendo started rendering some dongs.
Well, to be fair, they haven’t actually shown anyone’s dick, but they’ve implied it in some new footage for the upcoming Nintendo Switch title, Mario Tennis Aces. The new picture features Mario‘s taller, less popular brother, Luigi, and shows some clear bulge action happening in the shorts region.
It didn’t take long for the internet to start debating the potential length and girth of Luigi’s chongus because, well, that’s what the internet does.
https://twitter.com/damnmanitscam/status/974202865454600192
According to a few people who used fucking algebra to figure out the size, it’s roughly 3.7 inches when flaccid. Do with that information what you will.
https://twitter.com/Comics212/status/974173826111197185
Others have been thoroughly shaken by the news of Luigi’s flaccid bepis.
https://twitter.com/thatunotoad/status/974127995169452032
https://twitter.com/shadierr/status/974348240974888960
you know what no I’ve seen too many pictures of luigi’s mediocre dick for one day
— Rosemary (@dragonkisser420) March 14, 2018
https://twitter.com/sleepykitter/status/974150771263623168
And some posts are just… Fuck, I don’t know, but I refuse to suffer alone.
explain this then pic.twitter.com/FarMdABwVh
— Rosemary (@dragonkisser420) March 14, 2018
This is just like the time everyone lost their minds after seeing Mario’s nipples for the first time, only way worse and slightly mentally scarring. But hey, that’s the risk you take for living life online, right?
Somewhere, Shigeru Miyamoto is banging his head against a wall. You have all sickened him.
