‘Scuse Us, Saint Laurent, But What The Fuck Are These?

This just in: Saint Laurent is absolutely fucking with you.

The fashion house might’ve made a thing of stilettos with the YSL letters as the heel, and it might’ve made the fashion world shit bricks over its latest glittery shrug boots, but its new offering is taking the almighty piss.

Did you want to break every bone in your body today? Good. Saint Laurent has you covered. These walking death traps masquerading as high fashion must-haves will set you back a cool £1,995 (AU $3,315) plus medical costs.

However, if a trip to the ER isn’t quite your jam, then the fashion house has also been selling these far, far safer roller skates for men since at least 2013. Somewhere, an honours student is already preparing a 6,000 word dissertation on sexism in high fashion.

The stilettos first appeared in an ad campaign banned in France after more than 200 people complained that they were “degrading” to women.

I’d wager most people were complaining about the model’s pose, but IMO they should have looked a little harder at what was on her feet. My girl just stacked it hardcore. Someone help her up.