Please light one more votive candle than you usually would during your nightly prayers for The Hilton Family as they today mourn the loss of their beloved daughter, an iconic heiress whose life gave us all a great deal of joy and to whom civilised society owes a great debt – one that we’ll never be able to repay.
But despair not, for Hilton’s was a life well lived: lavish and pampered beyond compare, neither wanting nor needing for anything, instead knowing only luxury in the truest sense of the word.
Born into great wealth, Hilton travelled extensively throughout her nascent years while not famously living in her own mansion in Beverly Hills where she resided between extended stays in the Hamptons in the company of other socialites of her ilk, like Nicole Richie and Kim Kardashian West née That Girl Who Organises My Closet.
As a teen, she began courting fame through an inadvertently lucrative modelling career and through constant exposure to the paparazzi at social events and as as a front row fixture; she would later parlay that ease in front of the lens into campaigns for Guess, for which she was repeatedly photographed by one of the greatest image makers of our age, Ellen Von Unwerth.
Having developed a reputation as the defining It Girl of the noughts, Hilton then landed her breakout role opposite Richie in pioneering Fox reality series The Simple Life, where her unmistakable je ne sais quoi struck a chord with an adoring fanbase who anointed her the aspirational paradigm of mid-00s glamour.
Never far from the public eye – or controversy – Hilton spent her twilight years travelling the world cultivating interests and entrepreneurial ventures that for so long had eluded her, like EDM.
Hilton passed away today aged 72. She is survived by two dozen other bitches.
Rest in peace, Tinkerbell Hilton. Rest in peace, bitch.
Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images
