Now You Can Buy The $10000 Hermès Fixie You’ve Always Dreamt Of

Remember that time you forked out a significant chunk of the pennies to your name to buy that ridiculous $12000 Hermès basketball (strictly not for playing with, duh), justifying your decision somewhere between outdated and obnoxious tags of #yolo and #fashun?

Yeah, me neither. But in case you wanted to dream about adding to the ultra luxury sporting goods collection that you invariably do not have, Hermès have released a $10,000 fixie  – because the world wasn’t brimming enough with things that are just so (morally?) wrong and deeply warped. Thanks, Hermès.

The bike, which costs approximately five times more than the terrible car I call my own, is a fairly sleek piece of engineering (see above), and is suitably fucking awful in its description, as given to WWD: “We set out to make a real bike, not a decorative object. It had to be simple, efficient, easy to use, pleasant and elegant.” WAIT, you guys. It’s a REAL bike? Sign me up and max out my credit cards. I’ll take ten. I was under the impression that this thing was just the elaborate figment of Anna Wintour‘s imagination.

Le Flâneur d’Hermès (which actually translates to ‘The Hermès Stroller/Wanderer” because nobody in their right mind would actually put their lycra-clad butt on it and ride at any speed whatsoever) also boasts a belt-driven transmission, hydraulic disc brakes and a choice of eight or 11 gears integrated into the rear wheel hub, according to WWD. Wanker disposition not included.

Via WWD.

Photo by Photo By Grégoire Alexandre via WWD.