Look, here’s your warning: if you don’t want to see a guy’s balls being used as a makeup applicator, don’t scroll down. Seriously. This here article contains embedded footage of scrotal dabbing, and if it’s not your bag, you can read about somethin’ else right here. 

Here at PEDESTRIAN.TV, we strive to do our due diligence to deliver you the vital context behind each article. For this here piece, that strenuous research involved looking up how much beauty blenders cost. Folks, at time of writing, one of the nation’s most popular makeup retailers is offloading them for about $30 a pop.

With that in mind, it makes a whole lot of sense that an enterprising young woman would prefer to apply foundation to her forehead with a pair of testicles than dole out for an ovoid clump of foam.

American 18-year-old Johnna Hines saw it fit to avoid that expense by using 20-year-old partner Damon Richards’ balls as part of her regimen. How does the world know about said endeavour? She posted the footage to Twitter. As you do.

Seeing as Twitter didn’t immediately nuke the footage for violating its terms of service, the video has gone mind-blowingly (forehead-pattingly?) viral. It turns out that watching people use genitalia for everyday tasks is kinda amusing.

It’s not only us plebes who’ve taken notice either, oh no. Since that test-acular imagery worked its way online, noted make-up royalty Manny MUA, Jeffree Starr and Bretman Rock have expressed their support. We’re waiting for the Lisa Eldridge co-sign here, tbh.


That fucktonne of attention has also apparently opened up some commercial pathways for the creative duo, with Hines claiming an interested party has offered a sweet deal to piggyback on her newfound viral fame.

There are a couple of other questions worth asking about this whole saga. The first, of course, is what did Richards himself make of the ordeal? 


The second, and most important: how effective was this brave new technique?


Welp, if you’ve got a willing participant in your life, feel free to try it out for yourself. Just make sure you don’t poke your eye out.

Source and photo: @punkzillaa / Twitter.

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