We Regret To Inform You That Kristen Stewart Has Crossed Over To The Volturi

Whatever happened to sweet little Bella Swan from Phoenix, Arizona?

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She journeyed from her hometown to Forks, where she fell in with a gang of obscenely pasty vampires. Wedded one of them. Fucked him. And had his child.

After several years and five awful but iconic films of evading the Volturi, a gang of malicious vamps, she and her magical comrades ultimately defeated them by projecting the grim future that would be if they dared to take on the Cullens.

And so the Volturi retreated and Bella and Edward lived happily ever after… or so we were led to believe.

Based on IRL Bella Kristen Stewart’s latest movements, it would appear that the Volturi dismissed Alice Cullen’s warning and returned to recruit one more evil vamp.

Stewart recently stepped out at the Chanel Paris-New York 2018/19 Metiers d’Art show in Seoul, South Korea where she looked absolutely nothing like the aforementioned precious angel from Phoenix.

The 29-year-old actress wore a white see-through button-up shirt with pleather high-waisted black shorts, black thigh-high lace-up boots, black purse and a slew of necklaces, but it was her bizarre beauty lewk that propelled her into international headlines.

Stewart put on a dark smoky eye with her bleached pixie cut parted down the middle.

WHO

IS

SHE?

With Bella now a faithful minion of the Volturi, we certainly wouldn’t want a rematch of the infamous final battle because something tells me the scales have tilted dramatically in their favour.

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