Icelandic President Forced To Clarify Stance On Outlawing Pineapple Pizza

Iceland‘s president has been forced to clarify his comments about pineapple on pizza.

While visiting a high school in northern Iceland last week, President Guðni Th. Jóhannesson (pronounced, uh… yeah good luck) said he “fundamentally opposed” pineapple on pizza, and that if he could, he would ban pineapples as a pizza topping altogether.

The ‘pineapples on pizza’ debate has waged globally for years (despite the fact that it is an obviously good topping and anyone who says otherwise is miserable and wrong), so you can guess what happened next:

Mass media coverage.

The president has now released a statement clarifying his comments about wanting to ban pineapple on pizza, and honest-to-fucking-god, you try reading this statement with a straight face. Go on.

“I like pineapples, just not on pizza. I do not have the power to make laws which forbid people to put pineapples on their pizza. I am glad that I do not hold such power. Presidents should not have unlimited power. I would not want to hold this position if I could pass laws forbidding that which I don’t like. I would not want to live in such a country. For pizzas, I recommend seafood.”

Pineapples on pizza is bad! Fascist regimes are bad! For pizzas, I recommend seafood.

I cannot breath.

President Jóhannesson, who was elected last June, is hugely popular in Iceland, at one point enjoying an unheard of approval rating of 97%. The Guardian attributes this goodwill to his refusal of a 20% pay rise, his 10% donation of his pre-tax salary to charity, and his becoming the first president of any country to march in a Gay Pride parade.

The publication also reports that he’s frequently spotted picking up a takeaway pizza on his way home from work. We can only assume it is one without pineapples on it, and for that, he must be impeached. Sorry.

Photo: Facebook / Forseti Islands.