Happy 87th Birthday Sir David Attenborough

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Published

May 8, 2013

Happy Birthday to You, Sir David Attenborough!

Had you not been born on this day 87 years ago, it cannot even be confirmed that anybody would give a singular fuck about all the lovely things to be found in this wonderful world. Kidding! All humans everywhere have always been 200% transfixed by nature in the absence of your hushed, reverential voiceovers, the ones so soothingly laced with the curative capacity for anything evil…

ANYHOO, whatever the case— hypothesising about how things might be if you weren’t around is pretty morbid and counterproductive.

On behalf of all persons, assuming that ‘persons’ equals a homogenous entity devoted to adoring you each and every day, we at Pedestrian hereby direct great piles of birthday cheer and the deepest gratitude right at you. So here’s to you, Sir! (If you think this post is gushy and weird, dilute such sentiments with a quick visit to Letters to Sir David Attenborough).

You started as a small boy with a keen interest in collecting fossils. In 2002 you made the cut for the 100 Greatest Britons, and your UK homeboys consider you a National Treasure. You’re a beloved naturalist whose career has spanned some six decades. Now, to celebrate your life, we turn to this image of you posing with a floral sculpture of yourself outside the Royal Botanical Gardens at Kew Gardens this time last year.

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Also, we offer a video that perfectly illustrates the exalting powers of your voice alongside a baby tortoise gyrating into the least romantic kind of shoe, a khaki croc.