Accepting the role of Prime Minister comes with a lot of perks, the most glaring, obvious and unflattering of those naturally is being at the mercy of newspaper editors across the country. While Tony Abbott and Kevin Rudd seemed to share the front pages across the nation on Saturday on Election day, you may be aware that today’s newspapers have launched in to their first business day under a new government with suitable Tony Fever. And while that might be a perfectly reasonable and harmless thing for an arguably significant change of government, it became all the more frightening (and potentially NSFW?) after Tony Abbott stepped out on early Sunday morning and got on his bike. Being the true MAMIL that he is, it was the perfect—and seemingly only—photo op of the day that the press could guzzle up.
And guzzle they did. If you’re picking up a newspaper today, our condolences: nobody should have to see this much of our future Prime Minster. Certainly no stranger to sporting budgie smugglers or donning lycra so tight the nation worries for the man’s health, today’s headline images certainly beg the question: exactly how much of Tony Abbott’s crotch will we be subjected to over the next three years? Most importantly: how do we make it stop, quickly? Remember, this is only day two, people. We’ve got a whole lot of front pages not to look forward to.
This was the popular image of News Corp‘s titles today, someone shield the eyes of any children present:
Major online newspapers used THIS image extensively yesterday. And The Sydney Morning Herald thankfully kept things above the belt. But if Adelaide friends thought they could open their paper sans Abbott’s junk? WRONG. The Advertiser slipped in a small picture on the bottom right of their front page with junk at the centre:
OK, everyone, I know what you’re begging to know next. What about the stunning journalism of the NT News that everyone began to respect on Saturday from their front page? What kind of crotch shot did they display? Well put this in your pipe and smoke it: the NT News has gone back to business as usual, with a crocodile inspired joke naturally covering the front page. Onwards and upwards NT News, bless your gorgeous souls:
