Arbiter of haute culture nonpareil, Miley Cyrus, is currently in Australia on the next promotional leg of her inevitable tour toward the grave.
In these troubling times of great uncertainty and even greater anxiety around gift-giving and daily social interaction, it’s often helpful to find something unerring to which we can anchor our lives. It is then to Miley Cyrus to whom we turn as an upstanding beacon to light the black abyss that is slowly but surely engulfing Australia.
Herewith then is a rolling list of anything and everything Miley Cyrus has tenuously endorsed thus far on her altogether too brief and yet strangely eternal tour of Australia, so that you too might know what to wear, where to eat and what to gift the teen in your life this coming Christmas.
Merry Bangerz.
DI$COUNT UNIVER$E
Long a champion of the Melbourne-based label’s understated aesthetic, Miley Cyrus has near exclusively worn DI$COUNT UNIVER$E’s bedazzled wares throughout her stay in the Antipodes. Here she is wearing a “fulllllllll liewkkkkk” on a private jet; here’s another full look worn onstage in Melbourne; and below you’ll find the ensemble worn on Sunrise this morning, taken from the label’s off-schedule, off-chain presentation from Australian Fashion Week. Very chill.
PIE FACE
Show me a man who hasn’t resorted to a box of Pie Face in his hour of need and I’ll show you a liar, or a vegan with incredible restraint.
Hot tip, Pie Face Social Media Manager: here’s a month’s worth of content for your largely neglected editorial calendar.
EUREKA REBELLION TRADERS
Next time you’re in Collingwood and the impulse for new ink strikes you, make like Miley and head to Eureka Rebellion Trading (454 Smith Street, Collingwood, Victoria).
Or don’t, you’re an autonomous human being capable of making well-informed life choices removed from the influence of a pop singer.
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Here’s another RAD shot of MYLES PATEN tattooing MILEY CYRUS at ERT HQ @mylestattooer @mileycyrus #eurekarebelliontrading #mileycyrus #barbershop #tattoostudio #melbourne #collingwood #smithstreet #rad #bangerz
THE EARLY ARRIVAL OF SUMMER
Proof that not even Miley Cyrus is immune from that familiar vernal impulse to post incessantly once the mercury starts climbing.
FRIENDS WITH BOATS
Are the best kinds of friends.
TOURISM AUSTRALIA
Thanks you repeatedly, Destiny Hope.
TURNING UP AT 7AM
You’re never too young and it’s never too early to start, apparently.
FALLING DOWN AT 7PM
Never gets old on the other hand.
THE TRANSCENDENTAL CAPABILITIES OF THE SHERATON ON THE PARK
Now you know exactly where to start camping out, Smilers.
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the sunrise this morning was outta here ??????when I looked into it I felt this tingle between my eyes right on my forehead (my 3rd ??) I feel like it opened somethin up ??
Miley’s Bangerz Tour will continue unabated in Brisbane on the 15th, Sydney on Friday the 17th, Adelaide on the 20th and concludes in Perth on October 23rd.
