What is it about the woods?
First Hillary Clinton was spotted hiking in them like some kind of pantsuit-wearing Yeti. Then she announced her return to public life by saying that she was “ready to come out of the woods”. And THEN, not 12 hours later, a picture emerges of Donald Trump Jr. posing in the woods like he was carried there on a golden throne.
Coincidence? I think not, despite the fact that the probability of these woods being the same woods is 1 in about a million.
‘Donald Trump Jr. Is His Own Kind of Trump’ said the New York Times (or as his dad calls is, the “failing New York Times”), and published a picture of Donald Jr. at his family estate in Bedford, NY.
Donald Trump Jr. decided early on not to measure himself against his father https://t.co/HXIxaRxHOV
— The New York Times (@nytimes) March 19, 2017
Obviously, and with swift inevitability, the photo of Donald Jr. looking like he was mid-poop was viciously and without mercy torn to absolute shreds.
If Donald Trump Jr. speaks in a forest, is he still being ignored by papa? pic.twitter.com/rq9bjQdTxH
— Lauren Duca (@laurenduca) March 19, 2017
Donald Trump Jr. looks like he got stood up again by his dad on their annual father-son camping trip. pic.twitter.com/huwsiMHlsc
— Classic Dad Moves (@ClassicDadMoves) March 19, 2017
Available for pre-order! #DonaldTrumpJr #BookCover pic.twitter.com/4dpL8ZoBiV
— Ben Mautner ?????? (@RoyalSapien) March 19, 2017
Donnie and Pooty Sitting in a Tree,
U S S R K G B @DonaldJTrumpJr @putinrf pic.twitter.com/E5TCN0kRKY— Louise Mensch (@LouiseMensch) March 19, 2017
how is he so bad at sitting? pic.twitter.com/Jg7cTMfDcc
— Jordan Freiman (@JordanFreiman) March 18, 2017
Tfw your assistant picked you up and carried you to a stump in the woods so as to not scuff your boots. pic.twitter.com/FcUHubW0Lc
— Scott Tobias (@scott_tobias) March 18, 2017
tfw when you see your friends post pics of a party on instagram but they didn’t invite you because you’re a bigot pic.twitter.com/tpNgPPa0Wi
— rob delaney (@robdelaney) March 18, 2017
when the screams of the elephant babies you orphaned drown out your fantasy of eating a steak in front of a homeless veteran pic.twitter.com/JcM93JpON1
— rob delaney (@robdelaney) March 18, 2017
This is the only time I’ve found myself rooting for The Blair Witch. pic.twitter.com/kMCGdcEsdQ
— Half An Onion (@HalfOnionInABag) March 18, 2017
Donald Trump Jr. in the Oval Office. “Father, I have logged on. Father?” pic.twitter.com/CjRqxbh6oQ
— Stephen Carroll (@StephenTweeted) March 18, 2017
You can read the piece here, if you want. It’s a bit off. At one point, journalist Laura M. Holson writes that Donald Jr. is a successful public speaker “who brings in an estimated $50,000 per speech”, which is another way of saying he was paid a shitload to speak at an event hosted by French allies of Russia.
Photo: New York Times.
