Buy Yourself A Clamshell Pool, The Season’s Worst Heatwave Yet Is Coming

Buckle up folks, because the next few days are going to be a goddamn scorcher.
According to weather tracker Higgins Storm Chasing, most of the country is set to experience the strongest heatwave for 2016/17; a low pressure trough will mean parts of Queensland, New South Wales, South Australia and Victoria will hit the high 30s and, in regional areas, possibly mid-40s for the next four to five days.
HSC, which was so inundated by worried social media folks their website crashed over night, also noted that all capital cities will see temperatures of 6-11 Celsius above average. 
Because they also figured that a purple monster of a weather map isn’t enough to scare us (wrong!), HSC’s Facebook post also described the event as “Hell on Earth in Australia“:
February’s fuck-off heatwave also follows 2016 AKA The Hottest Goddamn Year On Record, and, for you Sydney folk, the hottest January on record
It also brings with it the usual safety precautions, such as respecting total fire bans: 
“This is also another reminder that with upwards of 15 million people being impacted by this heat, avoid strenuous activity during the day.. the body will struggle to breath with increased sweat and lead to an increased risk of heatstroke.” 

“Drink plenty of water, dehydration is a major factor in heatstroke and heat related illness. Look after young children, the elderly, pregnant woman, those who are currently sick as well as pets and animals – all of these have an increased risk of heat stress.” 
So yeah, look after yourselves, your kids and ya pets folks. 
Not for nothing, and, despite what some of our esteemed politicians might say, it also might be time to take those conspiracy theorists at NASA seriously and bring back a fucking Emissions Trading Scheme.
For anyone in the five affected capital cities, behold the following, terrifying forecasts, starting with Thursday February 8th and followed by each proceeding day’s temperature:
  • Adelaide: 41 / 41 / 39 / 37
  • Melbourne: 34 / 37 / 27 / 28 
  • Canberra: 26 / 35 / 40 / 41 / 35
  • Sydney: 26 / 29 / 35 / 39 / 36
  • Brisbane: 31 / 31 / 32 / 35 / 37

Photo: BSCH Stormcast.