Professional footballers, left to their own devices, are a wild and wooly bunch, prone to truly shocking decisions regarding their own personal appearances. That rule 10,000% does not apply to Richmond cult hero Sydney Stack, whose isolation haircut is a sight to behold.
All AFL players are back at training this week following the lengthy coronavirus shutdown, and more than a handful of them are sporting the kind of haircuts that 10 weeks in solitary isolation can only produce.
Stack, however, bucked that trend by swanning back into Punt Road Oval looking like the finest Willy Wonka treat in the candy store.
Richmond’s own Twitter account highlighted the truly magnificent look, with Stack even going so far as to find the camera like a damned champ.
— Richmond FC ???????? (@Richmond_FC) May 19, 2020
God damn, look at that. My dude is straight up sizzling.
By a large margin, that’s the look of the (new) pre-season. It’s not even a close battle.
In fact the only one that comes even remotely close is Geelong’s Quinton Narkle, whose freshly pink locks are a vision, sure, but not quite in Stack-territory.
— Geelong Cats (@GeelongCats) May 18, 2020
That being said, it’s a hell of an improvement on just whatever the living fuck went on amongst the Essendon playing group during isolation.
Iso does strange things ????
Nice to have some normality back. pic.twitter.com/dgog3UCsry
— Essendon FC (@essendonfc) May 18, 2020
That bleached mullet tail is fucken disgoostang, Jesus wept.
But those pale in comparison to the nightmare job enacted upon the skull of Melbourne’s Max Gawn.
Bloody hell, man. You’re the captain. What the fuck are you doing.
Footy’s back, friends. Footy is well and truly back.Image: Twitter / Richmond FC