It’s not even remotely a stretch to suggest that the bulk of Australian professional sport – almost all of it, really – is fairly unstylish, particularly when it comes to game day attire. The rigid adherence to team culture denies players the ability to splash out on personal outfits, and while on a Team Culture™ front that may be for the best or whatever, it just leaves us all seriously envying the US, whose sports players can casually rock up to a game decked out in full Dodgeball cosplay for the pure hell of it.
The Houston Texans defensive core, consisting of inside linebackers Tyrell Adams, Zach Cunningham, Benardrick McKinney, Peter Kalambayi, and Dylan Cole embraced a little of that Average Joe’s swagger, by rocking up in custom Dodgeball jerseys – all with their name and actual playing numbers on the back – and even managed to sort out an A+ Patches O’Houlihan getup as well. Wheelchair and all.
— Houston Texans (@HoustonTexans) December 8, 2019
“IF YOU CAN DODGE A WRENCH 🔧 YOU CAN DODGE A BALL❗️” 🤾♂️ pic.twitter.com/WoJCWcpFfM
— Justin Reid (@JustinqReid) December 8, 2019
Gotta say, the sheer effort that goes into something like that is truly spectacular.
As it turns out, the Texans’ LB core has been making a habit of rocking up to games in coordinated splendour.
Last week the group showed up in some deeply intimidating SWAT-inspired getup that would honestly have me packing up my gear on the spot.
How Texans linebackers showed up to face the Patriots: 😎
— ESPN (@espn) December 2, 2019
Prior to that, the group strolled into a stadium decked out in various Mortal Kombat attire, taking Raiden to jacked-up levels never seen before.
The Texans linebackers went full Mortal Kombat ⚔️
— NFL on ESPN (@ESPNNFL) November 22, 2019
The group has also donned Mario, Space Jam, and Ninja Turtles attire at various points throughout the current NFL season, displaying the type of commitment to a bit you’re not likely to see from pro-athletes again for a good, good while.
The Dodgeball getup is clearly the best of the lot, but. The vaguely stained cream scarf is the cherry on top of a very good cake.