Without question, one of the best things about travelling overseas is cranking the ‘Straya up to about 11 and confusing the ever-loving shit out of the locals with our dearly beloved and vigorously defended Australian slang.

It’s great because, largely outside of an Australian context, we speak virtually an entire different language. Wandering through Berlin somewhere? Tell a street vendor that you just need to reef some Pat Cash out of your sky rocket. Some goose in Rome trying to pull one over you? Calmly ask ’em to not piss in your pocket and tell you it’s raining. Hanging out with a few Seppos in the States? Inform every single one of ’em that you are not, under any circumstances, here to fuck spiders.

That goes doubly for those of you living overseas. You are the guardians of our highly refined tongue, and should spread the good word at any opportunity.

Take, for example, Andrew Bogut. The newly-minted Dallas Mavericks centre was profiled about the current political shitfit engulfing the US by the Dallas Morning News, to which he summarily remarked that both Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton were “full of shit.”

“They’re both full of shit. And they don’t really give two shits about the common man. You guys are in some trouble, quite frankly. I can’t vote.”

Dallas Morning News reporter Tommy Magelssen also relayed another comment Bogut had on the matter to Twitter:



Bogut, an avid fan of not being misquoted, relayed the correction in a glorious back-and-forth.

Magelssen then clarified for his American audience in hilariously professional fashion.

Now there’s one Yank who knows his arse from his elbow.

That said, “shit-ass” is absolutely fkn *MAGNIFICENT* and I’ll be damned if I’m not gonna give that phrase an ear-bashing tout bloody suite.

Photo: Christian Petersen/Getty.