Do you have a fire dating app profile waiting to receive the recognition it deserves?
Honey, you and me both, but I can’t win the prize I’m about to tell you about. We’ve got two lots of $2,500 to give away if you feel like your dating app is, you know, a real standout in a sea of many fish, or whatever it is your mum says when a guy fucks you over royally.
Perhaps you’ve got a punny bio or a horny iso alter ego you’ve let off the chain and can’t reel back in, or maybe you’ve just dribbled some nonsense to describe yourself because after the past few months you don’t know who you are anymore — as long as it’s entertaining, send it our way and we’ll get our audience to pick their faves.
It’s all thanks to Helium, which, ICYMI, is a dating app that lets users call out big no-nos like ghosting via a tagging system. In other words, it adds accountability to the dating app equation, which is hugely welcomed to singles just trying to find their way in the world. You can read more about how it works below.
First, you’ll need to grab the Helium app if you don’t already have it on your Apple or Android phone and write up a creative, entertaining or funny bio to rack up some positive tags. The more positive tags you have, the more chance you have of getting into the shortlist.
There’s one prize for the best female profile and another for the best male profile, so anyone’s welcome to get theirs over to us, pronto. And if you’re working with something boring right now, it’s the perfect time to ~jazz~ it on up for us. Get creative. Tell some jokes. Anything. Just do it.
If you’re keen on showing us your dating funnies, all you have to do is click the thicc button below and enter your Helium profile deets. Once we’ve chosen a bunch of our faves, we’ll publish them in another editorial and let the world choose the winners.
Even if you don’t win, maybe upping the ante will eventuate in some good head rather than another night with the Womanizer (love you, bb). If you’re really lucky, maybe it’ll get $2,500 AND a new lover! Fuck me (please), what a week that would be, huh?
Show us what you got, you horny thangs. You’ve got until the 16th of July to enter, so get cracking.