Fizzling. A word that’s gorgeous, hot and sexy when applied to things like a tall glass of Sprite, but makes me want to cry when it’s used to describe a relationship. Unfortunately, you may be all too accustomed to this dating trend, which is especially popular amongst the LGBTQIA+ community.
Hinge has released its 2023 LGBTQIA+ DATE Report, which details numerous facts about dating in the LGBTQIA+ world. One such finding is that “fizzling” is becoming more prominent, with 90 per cent of the survey responders calling it out as a fear when dating.
Fizzling is basically something people do to avoid looking like a ghosting dickhead on socials. They’ll say they’re too busy to respond or take ages to answer your messages, drip-feeding you responses until you get the idea that they’re just not interested in you.
I’ve fizzled, you’ve probably fizzled too. Sure it’s polite ghosting but it’s still fkn rude.
“Lack of communication has always been an issue in dating, but over the past year this has surfaced as the biggest challenge and area of opportunity for LGBTQ+ daters,” Moe Ari Brown, Love and Connection Expert at Hinge, told News.com.au.
“This lack of communication has caused a rise in the likes of fizzling, ghosting’s passive-aggressive cousin, as daters aren’t sure how to tell their date that they’re no longer interested.”
According to the Hinge report, 57 per cent of LGBTQIA+ individuals who use Hinge said that a “lack of communication” was the biggest obstacle in their dating life.
Dating in general is hard, but it can be harder still when your pool of potential matches is smaller than everyone else’s. Add to the fact that not everyone in the LGBTQIA+ community is actually respectful of other members, and you’ve got a messy field of candidates. Now sprinkle some communication issues throughout and you can see where the problems arise.
“Fizzling is a close relative of ghosting, and can be just as painful. Slowly phasing someone out without offering an explanation can trigger feelings of unworthiness, confusion, and self-doubt,” said Moe.
“If you’re not feeling the connection and contemplating fizzling someone to avoid talking about it directly, remember that there’s another human being on the other side of that screen and they deserve closure.
“Although sending a text may seem impersonal, it’s accepted modern-day etiquette.”
I feel like fizzling in the dating world and fizzling in the hookup world are two very different things, however. If you’re dating someone, show some fkn respect and communicate your feelings.
Now time to enter the monstrous caverns of my Instagram DMs and respond to the random memes my suitors sent me twelve weeks ago.
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