I feel like when we throw around the term ‘commitment-phobe’, it usually has a negative connotation.
But what if – what if – it wasn’t always a bad thing to fear commitment? I mean yes, you’ve got those duds who use the term to weasel out of a relationship without the decency to say they’re being shipped off to war like a normal liar, but then you also have commitment-phobes who are genuinely good people.
And who said being a commitment-phobe always had to apply to relationships? That’s merely the tip of the iceberg, my comrades. Nay, the tip of the tip of the iceberg.
So, before you go making these blanket statements to write off anyone who hasn’t shown you instant, unwavering affection, I’m gonna show you the upsides of commitment-phobia.
1. YOU MIGHT NOT DIE
Alright, stay with me on this.
Suppose you meet someone who has stabby tendencies. Would you rather that person commit to the stabbing, or would you prefer them to um and ah about it long enough for you to bolt to the nearest exit?
Yep, commitment-phobia’s saved more lives than all of us combined. Probably.
2. BARGAINS FLY AT YOUR FACE
Do you know how long it took me to commit to buying a new pair of shoes? A month. And do you know what happened in that month? They went on sale.
If I’d just been more decisive and got ‘em right on the spot, I wouldn’t have nabbed a sick bargain, and I definitely would’ve wanted to cry when I saw the same pair of shoes on sale while I was already wearing them.
3. NOBODY GETS TRAPPED
I can’t think of a worse nightmare than casually falling into a marriage with someone I’m merely fond of.
I also think that this happens more often than people let on. I get it – it’s easy to stay with someone who you get along with because you fear you won’t find someone else (you will), but is it fair on anyone involved if there are no genuine feelings of love there? Hardly.
At least if you’re dating a commitment-phobe, you’ll be able to tell early on and you can get outta there before it’s too late.
4. SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS AREN’T SET IN STONE
I can’t be in the minority here by claiming that at least once a week, every single soul in Australia makes plans with someone only to realise they simply cannot be arsed.
Usually, you just go through with it so you don’t seem rude but you still hold out hope that the other person backs out of it so you don’t have to.
Well, if you were friends with more commitment-phobes, you wouldn’t have to back out of a social engagement ever again in your life – they’d all do it for you.
5. MONEY’S LESS LIKELY TO BE BLOWN
Commitment-phobes are notoriously hesitant – that’s their entire schtick.
So, you’d be surprised how often it comes in handy on a daily basis. There’s no chance that you’ll go out and sign up for a year-long gym membership that’ll only be used when you want to graft some thottie, and those phone plans that lock you in for 20 years won’t even be on your radar.
It’s honestly the best way to live your life.
Plus, there are so many options these days that don’t require commitment, so why even bother? Gyms now offer no lock-in memberships (at least, that’s what I can gather from the one I try to avoid down the road), and phone companies like numobile offer cheap-as pre-owned phones on a month-to-month plan, so you save yourself a small fortune on phone bills.
Commitment-phobia: the superior phobia.Image: iStock / PeopleImages