Look, I know I’m not exactly known for my tact when it comes to speaking about animals and insects. I’m probably the worst person to write about this very scary, very long snake someone spotted in Australia’s Far North Queensland, but here we are. You’ve got me. Facts Only Mel.

So. The snake is actually a scrub python, and they’re known as the longest snake species in Australia. They’ve been known to measure up to 8.5 metres long according to The Cairns Post. Which is just far too long in my opinion. As my colleague Courtney said, that is a danger noodle, not a snake. Here’s the pic, taken by Susan Maeve Keller and shared by Destination Daintree.

Credit: Susan Maeve Keller.

Fun fact – if you go up to Cape Trib, you could literally have the road blocked by one of these bebs.

“Our snakes like to warm themselves on the road at night, so please be careful while driving through our beautiful rainforest,” Destination Daintree wrote about the photo.

Look, some snakes are cool. Look at this cute snek having a little beverage, for example.

He can stay. Then there’s snakes like this:

No thank you goodbye you slippery demon.

In short, what I am saying is that I hate snakes but not as much as I hate spiders, and sometimes snakes are cute, and the Very Long Danger Noodle is in an undecided camp because he is far too long, and yet also was just having a lil’ rest on the road and not biting anyone’s face off. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

Source: Cairns Post
Image: Suan Maeve Keller