You know what sucks? Telemarketers. I’ve been receiving phone calls from the same phone scammers every day for a WEEK now, and I’m about to flush my phone down the toilet. There’s something peculiarly infuriating about receiving dozens of calls from the same numbers with no method of recourse.
Imagine how much better it would be, though, if you discovered that all the calls were being made by a tiny but entrepreneurial reptile.
That’s what happened at the Ke Kai Ola Marine Mammal Centre in Hawaii, home to Dr Claire Simeone, and also one very industrious gecko.
Dr Simeone explains in a satisfyingly GIF-heavy Twitter thread that last Wednesday, a phone-related mystery began to unfold.
During her lunch break, Dr Simeone – a seal expert who runs the mammal centre – began to receive phone calls from inside the centre itself. When she answered, however, she heard nothing – no breathing, no clicks or beeps or static, just eerie, unending silence.
But when she’d hang up, another call from the same number would immediately come in.
More calls. NINE calls in 15 minutes. I start to panic a bit, and drive back to the hospital. Seal emergency? I am on it. pic.twitter.com/qtjc2ZK68d
— Dr. Claire Simeone (@Claire_Simeone) October 5, 2018
It was not a seal emergency. Once back at the animal hospital, Dr Simeone receives several more calls, including from other people who’ve been phoned by the silent redialler. No-one seems to know what’s going on.
She calls the phone company, who tell her that yes, “a bazillion” calls have indeed been made from one particular line within the hospital, but they can’t trace exactly which one.
I walk around the hospital. Not the fish kitchen. Not the office. Not the viewing room. I get another call from @TMMC on my cell. I enter the laboratory. That’s the line! I approach the phone… pic.twitter.com/CBym9fY01H
— Dr. Claire Simeone (@Claire_Simeone) October 5, 2018
There, in the laboratory, she discovers the culprit: a tiny green gecko, who’s been making all the bazillion calls with his tiny gecko feet.
THERE IS A GECKO SITTING ON THE TOUCHSCREEN OF THE PHONE, MAKING CALLS WITH HIS TINY GECKO FEET!!! This gecko has called me 15 times, and everyone in our recent call list. *Actual photo of telemarketer* @TMMC @GEICO @HawaiianTel pic.twitter.com/USyKeOiDbE
— Dr. Claire Simeone (@Claire_Simeone) October 5, 2018
He’s not even a resident of the animal centre! Simply a freelance reptilian go-getter, doing his best to connect to the wider world by using all the technology available to him.
So, if you received a silent call yesterday from @TMMC #KeKaiOla, you are welcome, and you may mail us your donation check anytime. @GEICO corporate sponsorships available. 🤣 #onlyinhawaii #withaloha
— Dr. Claire Simeone (@Claire_Simeone) October 5, 2018
I love this story. So does Twitter.
HAHAHA! Gecko did not disappoint! Plus, @HawaiianTel man got extra points for saying, “wait, aren’t you The Marine Mammal Center? That’s not a marine mammal!” #hesrightyouknow
— Dr. Claire Simeone (@Claire_Simeone) October 5, 2018
Reminds me of the time my cat changed the message on my answering machine to meow.
— Pat Stroud (@PCStroud) October 5, 2018
This is hilarious – and it also apparently inspired little @ACCTPhilly foster kitten Beanie to start sending random messages to people and pages too! pic.twitter.com/64musGsTsB
— Morris Animal Refuge (@MorrisAnimal) October 5, 2018