Every now and then a wedding mishap story makes its way onto my radar and leaves me cringing into my spine so hard it reverses my scoliosis. But this story is NOT one of them. Enter this iconic bride, who literally knocked a small child out of her way to perform a sexy, very public lap dance on her new husband. The confidence I aspire to have.

The video of the US bride from Florida is going viral on Twitter after a person shared it asking “IS THIS THE BRIDE??”. Which I guess is a fair concern if you’re a loser like me and haven’t had a wedding to twerk your ass off at.

In the video, the bride known only as Rochelle can be seen wearing a completely backless (as in, ass out and everything) silver dress and a matching shimmery G-string, with tassels gently caressing her cheeks. It’s… not the look you would expect at a wedding, but she looks hot as fuck so go off queen??

The bride seductively slides her fingers down her husbands cheeks (the face kind), before strutting away to the centre of the stage. And she pushes a little boy out of her way while doing it.

Some may judge her for this, but who among us wouldn’t knock over a small child for a lap dance, huh??

Anyway, the bride performs a choreographed lap dance to Beyoncé‘s ‘Dance For You‘, complete with bridesmaids as back-up dancers. Then it get’s real eye-popping, with the bride bending over with what I’m pretty sure is her ass crack directly in her husband’s face.

The most amazing part of this isn’t necessarily her dance — a bride can do whatever she wants on her wedding day imo, including publicly getting nasty with her man — but her family. Just watching.

I don’t even know if I’m gonna kiss my man at my wedding in front of my whole bloodline, let alone give him an almost naked lap dance.

But hey, maybe this is actually super cool and progressive: clearly her family is okay with her exploring her sexuality, and that is exactly the kind of positivity we want to see in this lord’s year of 2021.