In further evidence that nothing is real and we are all living in a simulation, the Teletubbies, of all things, have announced that they are vaccinated – and the IRL implications of this are throwing me into a tizzy.

The official Teletubbies account announced they are vaccinated “just in time for a Tubby hot summer”, and I am losing my fucking mind over it.

There is just… so much chaos here.

For starters, this implies that the Teletubbies exist on Earth and share some level of reality with us as humans, since we are susceptible to the same disease? And the vaccinations are human-made? Or, alternatively, the Teletubbies universe was also ravage by COVID-19… which has it’s own implications on Teletubby geography and politics.

The lore issues are summed up in this tweet, which I still am having trouble processing:

The Teletubbies are also for some reason 18 years old, with their birthdays listed as being in 2003… six whole years after the show actually came out??

On top of that, their vaccination card says they got their second jab on 22 July… which hasn’t fucking happened yet!! What is going on!!!

And yes, you heathens, I have already seen ten thousand tweets reminding me what the implications about being 18+ are, so don’t even say it.

Then of course, there’s just the implication that Noo-Noo is the one who vaccinated them which is fucking sending me. You mean to tell me this guy is a medical professional???

Basically, The Teletubbies are either timelords living in an alternate yet parallel universe in which capitalism, medical bureaucracy and COVID-19 all exist, or nothing is fucking real. I’ve had enough of the internet today. Good night to everyone, except the person who tweeted this: