Reddit is great for many things, but the only stories I care about from that hellsite are cooked relationships and unhinged wedding shenanigans. So, imagine my delight when I came across this absolutely abhorrent wedding invitation, which calls its guests “lazy fucks”.
Reddit user ScaredNapkin posted a picture of their cousin’s wedding invitation on the Wedding Shaming subreddit, captioned: “My cousin sent this along with her wedding invitations… I will not be in attendance.”
If you think ignoring a family member’s wedding is savage just because their wedding card is ugly, take a look at this awful number and think again.
The wedding invitation card is titled ‘Shit You Need To Know’, and the list is cringe to say the least.
For example, under ‘children’ it says: “Leave your little shit at home. We want to get fucked up. (We will turn you away).”
And for dietary requirements, it says: “Eat what you’re given, you fat fuck.” Classy.
It also tells people with questions to “check the fucking website” and instructs guests who are looking for parking to “follow the directions we fucking gave you, you dumbass.”
Something that I find funny is that for some reason ‘lazy fuck’ in “Google it, you Lazy Fuck” is capitalised as a noun, but none of the other insults are???
But the funniest part of the whole thing, as the thread’s comment section has pointed out, is that the only question not answered with cringe expletives is the ‘Wedding Gifts’ headline, which politely says: “If you wanted to give us a wedding gift, a contribution to our honeymoon would be perfect.”
I just – the audacity.
Reddit user UniCornOnACob819 said it best, commenting: “Every other point in this card: Fuck you, fuck off, fuck this, shit shit shit. Wedding gifts: ~maybe some money to go to our honeymoon~ uwu ????????????.”
I know, I know, the couple in question probably thought that this was hilarious in some weird, dark version of the Live Laugh Love aesthetic. But as someone who loves to hate, I don’t care.
