In deeply Auscore news, folks on the r/australia subreddit are debating the nuances surrounding Vegemite on toast. We’re talking spread to crust ratio, butter or no butter and even the addition of jam.
That’s right! Jam and Vegemite. It’s a flavour combination which absolutely sounds like something I’ll demand when I’m pregnant and craving delicious, perfect umami.
The discussion kicked off when a Redditor shared a photo of the Vegemite toast they were tucking into for breakfast. There didn’t appear to be butter, the spread was inconsistent and, frankly, there was simply too much crust showing.
Thus began the thoughts and feelings seminar about Vegemite on toast.
We had someone who echoed my grievance about the visible crust.
While another noticed the fact there was not a lick of butter to be seen.
One person even suggested the original poster go back to the drawing board, which was a bold move.
And another Redditor condemned the fact there was neither enough Vegemite nor butter.
But then the concept of butter stemmed into its own separate debate. People started questioning how much of the delicious, dairy-riddled spread was acceptable.
One person was adamant the Vegemite to butter ratio should be 50:50.
And another person (who was absolutely right, let it be known) said there should be so much salted butter smeared on that damn piece of toast that it becomes sopping wet.
I must agree that unsalted butter is an abomination. Obviously, it’s stunning for baking when you want to make sure there isn’t an ounce of salt to be seen, but on toast it’s simply desgoostangh. Truly a “go girl, give us nothing” sort of spread.
On the topic of spreads, people started sharing the other foodstuffs they pair with ye olde Vegemite.
One Redditor said they go for jam and asked not to be judged which, frankly, was a futile request because it’s a fucking rogue combination. Do they go for a marmalade? Raspberry preserve? So many questions.
Another person said they preferred honey and you know what? I kind of think they’re onto something there. I don’t know what it is but my tinfoil hat is firmly on.
A third acknowledged their hubris by admitting they would love to judge others, but they themselves enjoy Vegemite with peanut butter. I can only hope they opt for the crunchy variety.
If you need me, I’ll be thinking of the truly whacky ways one can enjoy the delectably salty spread that is Vegemite. Might go silly and give it a whirl slathered onto panettone, the perfect Italian sweet bread.
For more cooked Reddit content, you can check out our r/AmITheAsshole hall of fame.
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