Ahhh, Australia. A pretty fantastic country to live in if I do say so myself. We’ve got a lot of things to be proud of here, but we’ve also got a lot of fucked up natural occurrences, namely batshit spiders the size of small dogs, snakes out the wazoo and tennis-ball-sized hail. These TikTokers have collectively had enough of Australia’s shit, and have showcased the most dangerous things about living here in their respective videos.

First off we’ve got a video from user @molsybabe that I truly wish I had not seen. Her number one reason for people to NEVER come to Australia? Massive spiders. Are we surprised?

The spider in question here is one that looks like an absolute menace of a thing, and gives me tingles just looking at it. I truly had to look over my shoulder several times when I saw this. If you’re afraid of spiders, maybe give this vid a miss.

@molsybabe

I love my country #Australia #aussie #spider

♬ Star Wars – Produced – Ettore Stratta

Next up we’ve got a video from @joelbergs, that talks about snakes in the toilet, unexpected animal visitors and, of course, massive fucking spiders.

“For some reason, snakes just love to hide in our toilets, so just check it before you use it, alright?” says @joelbergs in the vid, which warns against the batshit dangers of Aussie animals.

@joelbergs

3 things that will make you NEVER come to Australia! (IG: joel_bergs) #fyp #foryou #australia

♬ original sound – JoelBergs

Next up we’ve got hail that tries to kill you. Simple enough, but also something that we’ve all come across at least once in our lives.

That’s a big no thank you from me and my car.

@charlesmayne0

#fyp #hail #australia

♬ Give Me a Home Among the Gum Trees – Frankie Davidson

Snakes in the shower, exploding whale corpses and deadly pinecones. Let’s just add that to the list of reasons why Australia is not exactly a safe place to live in.

The homes aren’t safe, the oceans aren’t safe, the outdoors is definitely not safe. Where the hell can I hide?

@joelbergs

3 things that will make you NEVER come to Australia!!! #foryou #fyp #australia

♬ original sound – JoelBergs

To add more insult to injury, here’s a video that covers the lovely topics of crocodiles in the pool, kangaroo car crash accidents and spiders walking on your face.

I can see a trend here about the massive spiders wreaking havoc all across Australia, and I would very much like to leave as soon as possible please and thank you.

@joelbergs

3 things that will make you NEVER come to Australia! pt.3 (IG: joel_bergs) #fyp #foryou #australia

♬ original sound – JoelBergs

If you need me I’ll be busy booking the first flight outta here.

Image: TikTok / @joelbergs