Wordsmith Squeezes Entire Plot Of 25 Books You Love Into 140 Characters

Proving that composing ~just~ the right tweet is, in itself, an art form of the modern era, former Booker Prize Chairman Professor John Sutherland condensed 25 beloved books into 140 characters.

We say ‘beloved books’, but perhaps ‘sold a lot of copies and got turned into a movie’ might be a better qualifier, or else how the bleeding eff did Twilight AND Fifty Shades get in a list chosen by a Booker associate, current or no.
Originally published by The Telegraph, this list contains (mini) spoilers – if you can decipher them.

25. One Day, David Nicholls (200) 

In 140 characters: ?day thru yrs. 15jul, Dextr+emma gradu8+have 1nitestnd. Life promising. Then: marriage,loss,breakdown :'(

24. Memoirs of a Geisha, Arthur Golden (1997) 

In 140 characters: 9yo Satsu + sis are sold 2 Geisha school. Frnd Pumpkin, unfriend plus Geisha Hatsumomo. WW2 begins with Satsu = winnr, Japan = losr. 

23. Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman’s Search For Everything, Elizabeth Gilbert (2006) 

In 140 characters: NY divorcee down in dumps goes 2 Italy 4 gourmet food, India 4 spirituality. Then 2 Bali where she finds balance + love 

22. The Golden Compass, Phillip Pullman (1995)
In 140 characters: Fantasy:Lyra+daemon in quest4Dust+other worlds. But Church=enemy. Also must stop plot2cut Dmons frm ppl (like removing souls)! Also, bears 

21. The Kite Runner, Khlaed Hosseini (2003) 

In 140 characters: Kabul. Amir + Hazara = Kite-fly buddies. Foe=Assef. Soviet invasion worsens, Amir unfrnds Hazara. Amir+dad go to US, all wrks out? 

20. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams (1979) 

In 140 characters: Insignificant blu-green planet w/ primitive apelike life demolished 2 make way 4 bypass. Arthur rescued by alien hitchhiker + wanders galaxy 

19. The Secret Dreamworld of a Shopaholic, Sophie Kinsella (2009)

In 140 characters: Shopaholic Bex has 6k debt! Cook4self + wear same clothes for +1mth?! :-O Mebbe rich men help? No but TV job will! Can shop again – phew! 

18. The Lord of the Rings, J.R.R. Tolkien (1954) 

In 140 characters: Mythic epic: Sauron made ring2rule them all but loses it in battle. Mny yrs + a murder l8r, hobbit Frodo must destroy it w/ wizard+elves 

17. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time, Mark Haddon (2003) 

In 140 characters: 15yo w/Asperger, gr8 @maths. Idol=Sherlock. Solves mystery of y Mum+Dad broke up, somehow connected 2 pitchforked poodle in garden 

16. Twilight, Stephanie Myer (2009) 

In 140 characters: Bella is nu grl @skool. Who’s this mysterious guy? A nice shiny vampire! He saves B from van, men + evil vamp. They fall in <3 + go 2 prom. 

15. Life of Pi, Yann Martel (2001) 

In 140 characters: Dr.Dolittle on Noahs ark w/magic realism: Pi’s family own zoo, sail4Canada but Pi lost@sea alone except God…and animals incl. tiger! 

14. The Time Traveller’s Wife, Audrey Niffenegger (2003) 

In 140 characters: Henry+Clare happily married w/nrmal life xcept H sumtimes transported thru time.?Problems wen he interfere in future and 4sees C’s death ? 

13. A Game of Thrones, George R. R. Martin (1996) 

In 140 characters: Nobles of Westeros fight/plot for throne of 7 kingdms, while icy zombie types threaten from North + girl frm deposed family gets dragons. 

12. The Hobbit, J.R.R. Tolkein (1937) 

In 140 characters: Hobbit Bilbo <3 home but wizard Gandalf selects him 2 help dwarfs win back gold+kingdom stolen by dragon. Epic w/ elves, orcs, etc 

11. The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald (1926) 

In 140 characters: V.rich, enigmatic Jay Gatsby finds 1st luv Daisy, Tom’s wife. But it’s selfish D+T’s fault ends w/ Jay shot. Also “Gr8″Gatsby was bootlegger 

10. The Notebook, Nicholas Sparks (1996) 

In 140 characters: Noah reads lifestory 2 sum1: Bak frm WW2, tries 2get bak w/Allie tho now Lon’s fianc?e. Sum1=Allie now w/Alzheimer’s but 2gether @last! :'( 

9. Bridget Jones’s Diary, Helen Fielding (1996) 

In 140 characters: 20thC Pride+Prej:Bridget’s 30+, sgl <3 booze+cigs+frends. Troubles w/diet, job+men + Y are guys crzy abt a grl’s 4XXXL undrpnts?? 

8. Fifty Shades of Grey, E.L. James (2011) 

In 140 characters: Shy meek virgin Ana meets V rich control freak + BDSM dom: Christian Grey. Mild erotica + Xtreme wealth in feminism-free zone 

7. The Da Vinci Code, Dan Brown (2003) 

In 140 characters: Corpse in Louvre=coded msg! Symbologist man + cryptologist wman (chased by killer Xtian sect). Solve it: rveals truth bout Jesus! 

6. The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, Steig Larsson (2005) 

In 140 characters: Sweden: Man hired 2 find missing niece. Girl w/tattoo also investig8s. Find rape+murder conspiracy in $$$clan> exposed. Revenge=sweet 

5. P.S. I Love You, Cecelia Ahern (2004) 

In 140 characters: Holly+Gerry r married. G dies> H is :'( ? But yay! 10 letters frm G each mnth (all end w/ PS. I Love You) makes her ? ++ 

4. To Kill A Mockingbird, Harper Lee (1960) 

In 140 characters: 30s U.S,6yo Scout+bro Jem try2c recluse Boo. Dad=lawyer4Tom, innocent black victim2racist trial. S+J attackd, saved by B & lern life-lessn 

3. Gone Girl, Gillian Flynn (2012) 

In 140 characters: Amy&Nick r married. Amy fakes own murder 2 frame N. (who is rite?) A manipul8s every1, killz her ex. Evil A makes N stay w/ her 4 baby ? 

2. The Hunger Games, Suzanne Collins (2008) 

In 140 characters: Katniss+Peeta r ‘tributes’ in dystopian TVised fite2death. P <3 K. K goes wiv it, as luv story=$$$4survival. They win 2getha 

1. Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone, J.K. Rowling (1997) 

In 140 characters: Orphan 11yo Harry = wizard! Off 2wizard skool. Temp defeats Lord Voldie (whohe?) + 3 headed dog 2 bag the stone
Images via Google/Photoshop.