After watching ~that~ episode of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, pretty much everyone was waiting on ‘Wine in a Can’ to be a real, beautiful, tangible thing that one could purchase.
Now, that is a goddamn reality people! Dreams really can come true.
But there’s one catch: it’s only for men. Are you a man? Congratulations!
You and your violent hand gestures (because only fellas spill beverages when intoxicatedly telling a tale, right?) are permitted to drink the wine in a can.
As you can see in the above image of the cans, there’s only three flavours: Red, White, and White Fizzy. None of that feminine ‘Prosecco’ or ‘Tempranillo’ bullshit, right? GROSS.
The brand is called ‘MANCAN‘, and on each can, it explains exactly how it is super non-threatening to conservative ideas of masculinity, by proudly stating:
It’s ‘thought up by a guy who lives in an old firehouse, walks to work with his dog, has two bikes and a trike, and wanted to move beyond stemware.
‘At Mancan we believe wine is for drinking, not pairing and our “notes” are more rock than classical. Crush one at the game, throw one in your back pocket on a camping trip, or pop one open at your favourite dive bar. Just do us a favour and don’t talk about the “aroma”.
Of course! Because everyone knows that wine is girly, and only women can be sommeliers. Because lady parts or identifying as a female make you better holding glasses and drinking fermented grape juice. Ja feel?
CRUSH IT ON YR FUCKEN SKULL, BRUH.