With the Victorian State Election looming large this coming Saturday, the major parties are in full-on vote-grabbing mode. The long process of vetting candidates and ensuring they have the right people in the right positions is almost at an end, and yet we’re still learning that in some key seats the Liberal Party has managed to select utter buffoons.

Take, for example, the extremely marginal seat of Frankston.

Currently held by the incumbent Labor Party on a knife’s edge margin of under 1%, the Liberal Party has rolled out what should be the big guns in the form of Frankston police station commander Senior Sergeant Michael Lamb; a man who has served over three decades in the Victorian Police force, a large portion of which in the actual Frankston area itself.

Layup, right? Absolute walk in the park.

And then the deadshit goes on Sky News and David Speers turns him into a living Clarke & Dawe sketch.

Lamb, you see, went on the live-to-air interview to roll out a pledge that a Liberal State Government would allow the private sector to build a new power station to alleviate Victoria’s energy concerns.

Only that’s not exactly how the private sector works. A point which Speers pointed out repeatedly. To which Lamb had no retort.

It’s incredible viewing.

This is bordering on “the front fell off” territory. It is unreal. I am floored by this. John Clarke himself couldn’t have written anything this patently absurd.

How’s the closing exchange?

SPEERS: I’m still a little unsure.

LAMB: We’re going around in circles here.

SPEERS: I know. I’m just trying to establish…

LAMB: All my understanding of it is is we will… tender to… get… private industry to build a power station.

SPEERS: Ok, with a bit of help from the State presumably.

LAMB: Yes.

SPEERS: So a bit of taxpayers money.

LAMB: Yes.

SPEERS: Right. ‘Cause you earlier said it wouldn’t be.

LAMB: Sorry.

Put it in comedy writing textbooks. It’s flawless.