Few things bring Australians together in united glee than an American being wrong about something. It is the one and only true bi-partisan issue threading the patchwork quilt that is Australian politics. Long may we bicker and piss and moan at each other about petty, insidious bullshit. But place an American being wrong about something in front of us – particularly if that thing they’re wrong about is Australian – and suddenly we are one and we are many yelling at this wrong asshole. And filling the role of “Wrong American” in today’s performance: Conservative TV presenter Emerald Robinson, who apparently took a blind stab at the population of South Australia and missed by a country fuckin’ mile.

With all of South Australia shifting to Locky D mode from 6pm tonight, following a further two confirmed COVID-19 cases in an emerging Delta cluster, Robinson – a White House correspondent for right-wing network Newsmax, which is to Fox News as Having A Shovel Split Your Nose Open is to a rudimentary brick to the chin – decided to weigh in. What for? Who knows. But if we’re looking at this as a dart board, then old mate’s gone and stuck one into the bartender’s shoulder.

Robinson, in a tweet that is remarkably still up, launched the baffling claim that “Over 10 million people in South Australia are in lockdown again over 2 new cases of COVID.”

Over 10 million people. In South Australia.

Who knows where or how she got that figure from – though initial assessments have “her own ass” as an early contender – but just to be clear here: It’s not.

In fact a 0.5 second Google reveals the real figure floats somewhere around the 1.8 million mark.

Cue: The rabid pizzling from the online masses.

You get the idea.

That said, it’s certainly funny to think of a secret, hyper-densely populated pocket of Adelaide just fanging around under everyone’s radar. 4 million folks casually flitting about Hectorville. Another million or two in Grange. Maybe a casual 500,000 in Unley just to round out the numbers.

If a 212-storey citadel can magically appear in the suburbs of Melbourne, anything’s possible really.