You’re engaged, and it’s all very lovely and exciting so obviously you want to share the happy news. Can I just beg of you – from all the people who are privy to your social feeds and not currently in a romantic relationship with you, specifically – to spice things up a little when you announce?
We’re sick of cliche closeup pics of the new ring on your finger. We’re sick of hearing the life story of your love (sorry couples, it’s literally only exciting to you and MAYBE a handful of your closest friends). We’re also sick of that ‘we’re not like *other* couples we’re a *cool* couple’ sarcastic stuff.
There’s just so much more *jazz* you can add to this whole event. How, you ask? I’ve casually been brainstorming/ pinteresting the shit out of some ideas for you. Admittedly some are better than others.
The Zombie Apocolypse
I have no idea who this couple is, but god damn I applaud them. How do you spice up an engagement shoot? Throw in a zombie, duh. I am 100% not bored by their love.
The Snail Mail
You know what never goes out of style? Getting something that isn’t a bill in the post. So send your nearest and dearest a little postcard announcement.
The best part is, everyone loves getting mail so much that you can be as cheesy as you want and get away with it. Smoochy photo? Go for it. Ten-page story on your dating history? I mean, no one will read it but they’ll also find it cute instead of self-indulgent.
The Mug Shot
Screw a shot of the ring itself, imagine you (and/or bae but let’s not pretend this announcement shot is about them) with this adorbs mug from Etsy, sipping the REAL tea. Subtle and obvious at the same time.
This one is only for those who truly love a good practical joke/ messing with emotions. If you want peak engagement with a side of gotcha, change your status to single first. Leave it for a day, let people really start to freak out, then shoot out a mushy ‘we’re engaged’ photo.
Of course, this backfires a little if you get a bunch of “oh thank god, you’re better off without them” messages…but hopefully you make better dating choices than I do and can, therefore, avoid this.
The Gloriously Happy
Just gonna say it, so many people are making out their relationship is the shit online when actually no one else would touch it with a 10ft pole IRL. But then you get to shots like this – a bit cutesy, not hugely unique, but so damn full of joy that my heart is filled with happiness for this random Pinterest couple. It also made me LOL which always helps.
The Face To Face
I hate to get SUPER old school on you here, but how about just telling people in real life? It’s about 10000 times more sincere, it displays solid communication skills, and you also get to experience people’s initial reactions and facial expressions through something other than a double-tap or a heart emoji. Worth it for the novelty alone!
I get this might become a bit taxing if you have a wider social circle, but maybe wait until you’ve told everyone who actually matters to you and then just casually drop ‘fiance/e’ into an everyday post about your boo?
The Finger People
Feel free to fight me on this one, and I’m 98% sure this is just a stock photo, but for some reason I find ‘fingers as humans’ photos really appealing? There’s an ad at my train station that uses it and every morning I’m like “maybe I WILL check my bowel health every six months so my friends don’t run to the other side of the hand”.
You’re all very welcome.