Fuck Me, Look At The Size Of This Egg

We often report on speculation and innuendo, but in this case the conclusion is beyond all reasonable doubt: This egg is bloody big. It is truly enormous. It has heft. Girth. Volume. It is an immense bumnut. Completely in awe of the size of this lad. An absolute unit of an egg.

There is no two ways about it, mates. This truly is a big egg.


The absolutely mammoth chook egg is said to have come from the business end of a free range hen up at Stockman’s Eggs in Kairi, right up near Cairns in Far North Queensland.

The super-sized pre-bird, heaved from within the regular-sized chicken, had more surprises in store for farmers at Stockman’s: When cracked open, not only did a regular yolk and abnormal amount of white fall out, but so too did a second, smaller, fully-formed egg. A nesting egg. A babushka doll of ovum. A fully stacked set of the bastards.

A cursory Google reveals that this phenomena is relatively rare, but not unexpected, and is due to a process called a counter-peristalsis contraction.

No matter what the science though, the fact remains: The egg is big. And, more to that, we can only assume the ass of the chicken who laid it has been ruined; demolished; comprehensively destroyed. A pooper valve completely blown out, such is the size of this egg.

It is, without question, the biggest chook egg you’ll see today. And that is truly something.