An anonymous artisté has done an absolute number on Scott Morrison armed with only the spice aisle at Woolies. Put it in a museum, I say.
The spice aisle art was spotted in Kyneton — a town in Victoria — and shared Facebook.
“Someone had fun at Kyneton Woolies today…made me snort with laughter as I was looking for my bay leaves!” wrote the OG poster.
It’s a rare day when bay leaves make anyone laugh, so this is especially good news.
To see the art, you must hone your eyes in on the middle row. Spelled out there meticulously in herbs and spices is a simply glorious turn of phrase.
“Morrison is a groin stain,” it says.
What I appreciate most is the sheer creativity of this insult. “Groin stain” is a phrase used far too infrequently, in my book.
Yet it is certainly visceral as all good art should be. It conjures up not only horrifying mental images in my brain but also the phantom vestiges of lingering sweat smell in my nostrils. Coincidentally that’s what happens when I think about Scott Morrison for too long as well.
I also really appreciate the commitment to the bit here. My social anxiety is so pronounced that the thought of lingering too long in any supermarket aisle simply fills me with dread.
But this dedicated old master was willing to stand their ground (spices). They occupied the Woolworths aisle until their masterpiece was done and then left like a ghost in the night.
Kyneton’s very own Leonardo DaVinci. Who needs boring old drawings when you can have ~spice aisle art~.
My money for the anonymous fine art connoisseur is definitely on a disgruntled 23 year-old Woolies employee or someone’s very cool grandma.
Morrison’s week so far can be categorised as “Not Great, Quite Bad” seeing as it also involved him absolutely fucking decking a small child while playing famous non-contact sport, soccer.
But look, if you’re taking one thing away from this, it’s that art truly can be created in the most unlikely of places. A Woolies is not merely a grocery store. It is a canvas, a milieu of Australian life. Go forth my little artists. Go forth and create.