A man in Murray Bridge, South Australia has been arrested after allegedly biting off the ears of another bloke who came to check on him after a car crash.
The ear-biter had allegedly been doing burnouts in a Murray Bridge neighbourhood when he lost control of his car and crashed into a fence.
A nearby resident came out to see if he was alright, and the driver, for some reason, attacked him, punching him repeatedly and biting off the tops of both his ears.
In case you can’t believe what you’ve just read, here it is again: HE BIT OFF THE TOPS OF BOTH HIS EARS.
When cops showed up at the scene, the mad biter turned his unstoppable wrath on them, kicking one of them until he was eventually incapacitated with capsicum spray.
The poor bloke who went to assist him, who, we cannot emphasise enough, was just trying to do the right thing, was taken to Royal Adelaide Hospital for emergency plastic surgery.
The scene where a man allegedly bit the tops of a Good Samaritan’s ears off after he tried to help a hoon driver at Murray Bridge. #7News pic.twitter.com/vPvMLuHsfF
— 7NEWS Adelaide (@7NewsAdelaide) September 15, 2017
Fucken Mike Tyson over here, meanwhile, has been charged with a number of offences, including assault causing serious harm. Hopefully he gets the rehabilitation he needs to never set tooth on another ear again.
We’re all wishing the semi-earless resident of Murray Bridge a full-eared recovery. Christ almighty.
