Regular Newscast Captures Giant Spider Descending On Glasgow

Glasgow might have just experienced the joy of a successful Commonwealth Games, but all that happiness appears over now as a terror threat the likes of which we’ve never seen before is apparently besieging the city.
This ordinary BBC Scotland broadcast captures the extraordinary moment when life, as we know it, changed forever.

Ladies and gentlemen, that’s all the pictures we have so far, but what we’ve seen speaks for itself. Scotland’s largest city has apparently been taken over – “conquered” if you will – by a master race of giant space spiders. It’s difficult to tell from this vantage point whether they will consume the captive Scottish people, or merely enslave them. But, one thing is for certain: There is no stopping them. The spiders will soon be here.
And I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords. I’d like to remind them that as a trusted News Editor for a popular pop-culture website, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground sugar caves.