A Melbourne court is currently hearing evidence relevant to the defamation case Rebel Wilson has levelled at Bauer Media‘s Woman’s Day and trust us when we say it’s been far from your typical legal snoozefest.
Yesterday, the ‘Pitch Perfect’ fave shared a hallucination she once had about winning an Oscar while feverish with malaria, rapping her ‘acceptance speech’ to the all-female jury. Today, she discussed growing up believing she was related to the late, great Walt Disney… and all the perks that go with.
While Wilson’s exact genealogy is hard to trace, the court heard she’s always been told her great-aunt is Lillian Bounds, the late wife of everyone’s favourite cartoonist.
The 30-something Aussie actor was actually born Melanie Elizabeth Bownds but, she says, only has a last name that differs slightly to Lillian’s because her family chose to change the spelling of Bounds when it became the butt of jokes.
One would assume this information is relevant because she’s gunning for Bauer’s blood over a series of articles that claimed she told “tall tales” to add a “touch of fantasy” to her childhood in order to make it in savage Tinseltown.
But whether the jury believes she’s a Disney descendant or not is kinda irrelevant; her genealogy’s taken seriously enough to grant her access to the most exclusive of all theme park experiences: Disney’s fabled ‘Club 33’, a trio of private clubs that are the stuff of legend among diehard Disney fans.
Located in three of the Disney Parks (the original is in the heart of New Orleans Square in Disneyland California), Club 33 is so exclusive it’s rumoured less than 500 people are members.
Even if you’re invited to join, you’ve still got to cough up an initial US$25,000 for membership and pay US$10,000 in annual dues that go towards keeping the parks maintained.
What will your money get you, aside from a sexual favours from friends? First and foremost, access to all three private clubs – including the members-only restaurant hidden in New Orleans Square, which remains the only place in all of Disneyland that serves booze and is therefore the *true* Happiest Place On Earth.
“Most people wouldn’t know it [Club 33] exists,” Wilson told the court.
Stretched across the upper stories of the Square’s buildings, which are inaccessible to regular punters, it’s marked by a ’33’ address plaque that you’d 100% miss if you didn’t know it was there.
When you’re granted entry by swiping a pass that lets staff know to open the door, you take an old French elevator that Walt and Lillian had modelled after one they fell in love with on a trip to Paris (could this be any better) up to the v. plush dining room for lunch or dinner at an additional cost of US$100.
Wilson says she treated her good mate, actor Hugh Sheridan, to the VIP Disneyland experience last month, when they both enjoyed the perks of her connections in high places.
As a kid, Rebel says she had before-hours access to Disneyland and, to this day, never has to wait in line for any ride on account of her status as a Club 33 member.
She can also access secret areas inside the theme parks and HOW IS THIS FAIR OH GOD WHY.
Photo: Instagram / @rebelwilson.
