Christmas is nearly upon us, or at least the commercialised festive season that begins in mid-August. That means it’s time for QVB to bust out their Christmas tree again and oh god, what the heck is that?
According to the website, the tree is “inspired by the year it’s been”, which probably explains why it looks like a chaotic mess. I mean, look at this.
It is my sad duty to report that the QVB has put up its Christmas tree. This year’s theme: Sputnik and hi-vis garbage. (says it all about 2020, really) pic.twitter.com/5EFUT5vBOb
— Maria, Comrade Ghost (@oberonsghost) August 22, 2020
QVB claims the tree is “a symbol of joy and resilience for a time like no other,” and if this is what resilience looks like, I think I’m ready to give up.
To be completely honest (and I mean zero disrespect to the artist), but this tree looks like my lint roller when I haven’t vacuumed my carpet in six weeks and *definitely* dropped a few rogue chips on the ground.
Despite looking like an 80s fever dream, the tree isn’t *that* bad. It’s more the fact that it looks precisely nothing like the usual QVB tree we all know and love.
For years now, the QVB tree has been simple, elegant and exactly what you’d expect. There are no surprises. It usually resembles the sort of tree you’d find in your rich child-less aunt’s house – classic and filled with expensive-looking decorations.
But if last year’s tree was designed by your rich, child-less aunt, this year’s tree was slapped together by your four-year-old cousin who just screams “NEEDS MORE PINK SWIRLY THINGS” and cries.
I know they were trying to bring some colour and brightness back into an otherwise miserable year but fuck, it’s been a rough year and we are too fragile for this much chaos.
