Our Cone-Punching King Says He’s Running Low On Bud In Mandatory Isolation

Remember that Aussie traveller who told a news crew he’ll spend his mandatory 14-day isolation period punching cones? He’s now revealed his weed stocks are running dangerously low.

Reader, horrors never cease.

Speaking to Carrie Bickmore and Tommy Little on Hit Network yesterday, Tim, who had just returned from New Zealand with his partner Emma, said his plans to see out his coronavirus (COVID-19) time-out have been waylaid by a critical weed shortage.

“Yep, so exciting man,” Tim said. “Just a bunch of cones.”

“If you’re doing what I think you’re doing in lockdown,” Bickmore said, “the question I have is, ‘Had you panic bought before, or are you starving?””

“Nah, man,” Tim replied.

“We’re definitely starving. We didn’t buy, and it’s pretty hard to get toilet paper and the things you need, buds and stuff like that. So, yep.”

Grim.

When asked by Little how folks in Queensland have reacted to the COVID-19 pandemic and the ever-intensifying measures to combat its spread, Tim reminded the radio host “I’m stuck inside.”

Despite his apparent shortages, the fella reckons he’ll make it through.

“Just a lot of internet surfing,” he said. “A bit of PornHub.”

His interview came just before the Federal Government advised all Australians overseas that if they want to return home, they should come back via commercial flights immediately.

Upon return, those travellers will also be required to spend a fortnight at home in self-isolation, just to make sure they don’t display any symptoms of COVID-19 within the virus’ 14-day incubation period.

If you’re in that situation, here’s my take: stay safe, dodge contact with others, and, if you can, try to avoid Tim’s predicament. You can listen to the full interview here.

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