Fetch Thy Candlesticks & Playing Cards ‘Cos Most Of Aus Is Facing Power Outages This Week

Five states could be facing power outages from as early as this evening, so get out your Downton Abbey cosplay and prepare for some melancholy reading by candlelight. Maybe eat a hunk of cheese on some bread to really complete the vibe.

Queensland, New South Wales, Victoria, South Australia and Tassie can all expect maximum power load interruptions either this evening or tomorrow. That info comes from the Australian Energy Market Operator (AEMO).

Congrats to all the Western Australian baddies who’ll be able to keep their power. Use it wisely, legends.

The blackouts are set to hit NSW from 5.30pm to 10.30pm tonight and Queensland from 5pm to 10.30pm according to the ABC. Those states could also face more power interruptions on Wednesday.

God, as if living in Sydney wasn’t bad enough. Now we could be living in Sydney by torchlight, which is cursed as fuck.

The remaining states are slated to be affected tomorrow evening.

Chris Bowen, the Federal Energy Minister, said he reckoned NSW and Queensland could avoid power outages tonight.

“AEMO working with us, working with the states, has avoided any load shedding to this point and I have confidence they will be able to continue to do that, subject to any further unexpected outages,” he said per the ABC.

I hope you’re right Chris, because I cannot handle a night alone with my thoughts without the silly little distractions of TikTok and television.

“What the fuck is load shedding?” you may also be asking. Yes, it does sound a bit like a psychological tool my therapist would use to talk about my problems.

Essentially load shedding is when certain areas of the electricity network have their access to power deliberately stopped. According to the AEMO, this helps maintain the wider system stability and helps out with the supply and demand of electricity. An easter egg for the economics girlies there.

In short, it’s very much a last resort because no one wants to shut off the power. Torchlight is simply so 200-and-late, as the Black Eyed Peas would say.

Some folks in the Northern Beaches of Sydney lost power at around 8pm on Monday night, per the Daily Telegraph. I’m sure they had many artisanal candles on hand ready to deploy.

While it’s not guaranteed your power will cut out over the next few days, it’s probably a good idea to stock up on torches, candles, and food you don’t have to microwave or open up your fridge to access. Hence the cheese and bread I suggested earlier.

Speaking of which, when will they make a microwave powered by Wi-Fi? Just saying.

And if you’ve noticed your electricity prices skyrocketing too (a cherry on top of the power outage cake), suss our handy list of ways to keep cosy for cheapsies. Especially seeing as you might not be able to turn on the old electric blanket.