We know Queenslanders tend to pride themselves on the fact that stuff up there happens at a bit of a different pace than the rest of the country.

But mates.

Mates.

Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaates.

A bloke from Maryborough (near Hervey Bay) was arrested by police and subsequently imprisoned for four months after he was stopped in his car and found to be in possession of what officers suspected to be crystal meth.

But he was released – again, we repeat, after being held for four months – after police testing concluded that the substance in question was not crystal meth at all, and that it was, in fact, salt.

Police In QLD Somehow Mistake Salt For Meth, Bloke Spends Four Months In Jail

Yes, the substance in question turned out to be nothing more than everyday ordinary Epsom Salts.

Why the testing process took four freaking months to complete is the subject of debate, with the man’s lawyer suggesting his client’s lengthy prior criminal record played a hand in demotivating police to move the process along.

The delay plays into a long-running dissatisfaction with the way police and bureaucratic agencies in the state handle their business, with a Maryborough Magistrate stating his annoyance thusly:

“For the last 14 years nothing has been done (about the delays)… once again the government needs to have a look at what they are doing in relation to this.”

Why the testing process took as long as what it did to determine the difference between salt and actual meth is something of a mystery. Although a bang-up lemon tree sprouting from the point of disposal, and not a breed of ripped-off-their-guts supercops impervious to pain and fatigue was probably alarm bell number one.

We’re just saying that if you’re venturing to an IGA in regional QLD anytime soon, it’d probably be wise to leave the oregano on the shelf. Unless you’ve got a clear schedule ahead of you for the rest of the year, in which case herb that shit up and take your chances.

via The Independent.