Pete Evans is a huge fucking idiot, that much we know.
The “health coach” and chef, known for the kind of pseudo-science, quackery bullshit that makes Gwyneth ‘Goop’ Paltrow look like Marie Curie, Paleo Pete’s latest bout of insanity involves nudity, a horse and the kind of hashtags that make you want to walk into the ocean and never look back.
The suncreen-shunning, bone-broth aficionado and his wife Nicola Evans look to have gone “back to nature” over the weekend with the pair posting some questionable pics to Instagram that have everyone going “Ummm what the actual fuck are you doing?”.
Pete kicked things off with a post of him attempting to absorb the inner chi of this poor horse through his forehead, with the hashie #EntirelyInThePresent:
So wonderful to nip home for a day and reconnect to some very special beings in this life. My amaazing wife @nicolarobinsonevans captured this precious moment today as Zorro was chilling under the trees, while his big bro Olly stood guard. I also had the most beautiful time together with Nic and our little furry (????????) family too and I can't wait to find another 24 hours to do it all over again very soon. ???????????? Entirely in #thepresent
Zorro, we’re so sorry.
The real corker tho comes from wife Nicole’s Instagram, with this photo seeing her in what she refers to as her “free & bare Earth Suit” (ugh), also stating that Pete, too, got starkers with this no doubt scarred for life horse:
We gratefully spent the Spring Equinox in the ultimate organic attire… our free & bare Earth Suits! I must admit, yes I was at first apprehensive about posting this image of Baby Z & I, so I asked myself why??? Of course my programmed ego promptly stepped in & replied "for fear of judgement," to which my innate self replied "let that crap go honey bee… be free, judgement is nothing but an illusion!!!!!!" #celebratelifeeveryday #freeyourself #wearenature ❤️????
WUT. Getting your bits out in front of a horse does what now? Judgement is an illusion? THERE’S A HONEY BEE SOMEWHERE? PUT SOME CLOTHES ON, GOD DAMN.
Now I’m not one to usually judge others for their lifestyle choices as long as no one is hurting anyone else, but I mean, this is the guy who tried to sell paleo formula for babies that many, many professionals said could be lethal.
So yeah. Fuck Pete Evans. Getting-nude-with-horses ass, shit-eating grin looking, dangerous-fake-science-spreading motherfucker.Image: Instragram / Pete Evans